I was butt-naked in bed when i heard the fire alarm start going off. By the time I pulled a robe on and got to the kitchen I was getting dizzy and there was thick white smoke everywhere. The culprit? A frying pan full of sausages, moments away from igniting our kitchen. The chef? Outside, helping my other roommate hold a rat funeral.
Once we got it under control and opened the windows, they left. I went to my partner’s house to shower. Once I calmed down a little, I sent a very reasonable text saying that it could have been deadly, asking them to please clean the smell out of the kitchen, and seeing if we could all have a talk about safety and smoke alarms. Their response? I was trying to m
