grovesoteric

I just relapsed, HARD. I decided to try a little experiment and meditate every 3 minutes, for 3 minutes at a time. In between meditation, I would write for 3 minutes. I did this about 9 times, and I have to say.....I feel refreshed as FUCK. It's almost like I never relapsed...like I was reset. I wrote this on the final go round.

"""I have realized that you really are what you CONSUME. Be it food, drink, ideas, language, or media. Making sure to keep your "Diet" in check, is your own damn responsibility. The porn I consume becomes a part of who I am, Just like a McDonalds cheesburger. While the McDonads gives me greasy shits, and makes me fat, the porn gives me shit thought patterns, and m

I have been looking for a better job, so I've taken a break from smoking. I'm sure my tolerance has gone down a fair amount, since it's been like two months. What are some ways that might not be so obvious that I could celebrate my new tolerance and finally being able to smoke again!?

I get ridiculously bad anxiety when I even think about taking magic mushrooms, probably due to the fact that I have had some pretty horrendous trips. I have also had some uncomfortable encounters with cannabis. It's all rather irrational I believe...

It's irrational because I have only ever had bad trips whilst in bad company, or an uncontrollable environment. My good trips far out-way those rough ones in number and intensity. I've actually not had a bad trip in about four years. I've never had too bad of experiences with cannabis, I just think they are exacerbated by memories of bad mushroom trips.

**What can I do to stop having this anticipatory anxiety, preferably without the use of dru

I get ridiculously bad anxiety when I even think about taking magic mushrooms, probably due to the fact that I have had some pretty horrendous trips. I have also had some uncomfortable encounters with cannabis. It's all rather irrational I believe...

It's irrational because I have only ever had bad trips whilst in bad company, or an uncontrollable environment. My good trips far out-way those rough ones in number and intensity. I've actually not had a bad trip in about four years. I've never had too bad of experiences with cannabis, I just think they are exacerbated by memories of bad mushroom trips.

What can I do to stop having this anticipatory anxiety? Is this a form of PTSD? Has anyone

WARNING!!! POSSIBLE TRIGGERS (for those with no self control...)

Let me just start this by saying, I intend on completing my 90 days. I don't recommend anyone try anything I am going to write. If you are easily triggered then don't read this.

A recent talk with an "ex" dope addict has got me thinking though. Maybe porn isn't the problem. Maybe it's a cop out for the fact that I don't practice self control. Yeah, the copious amount of porn I use to allow myself was detrimental, but possibly in moderation I can still enjoy it. Maybe I can even use it as a tool to strengthen my self control.

For some strange reason, I feel like this whole "porn is bad and porn makes me do things or act a