[3200] The Alchemist's Memoria - Chapter 3 [Fantasy, Alzheimer's]

Hello, thank you for looking at my post.

This is my second post, I'm still looking to improve my work and I appreciate any and all feedback.I previously posted the first chapter but have edited a lot since then. This time I'm posting chapter 3 since I've gotten a lot more feedback for the first chapter.

Summary - Mori, the MC, is an eight year old girl living in a fantasy whorld (with an h) not too dissimilar from our own. Her father is a whorld famous alchemist who specialises in creating elixirs for life extension. Later on in the story, her father is diagnosed with a fantasy version of Alzheimer's and the story is about how the family copes with the disease and how the daughter tries to find a cure.

More detailed summary - In the first chapter we learn a bit more about what it means to be an alchemist and that currently they can extend the length of people's lives by several decades. Borge, the father, is logical and unemotional. Mori's father tells her that she must prepare for his death. In the second chapter we learn more about the MC's mother, Moon, her emotion, her spirituality, her differences in culture, some hints towards having experienced racism where they live and being very different from her husband. The MC tries to please both parents and struggles with identity, trying to relate to her father's anti-religious sentiment and scientific views of the world, and the mother's spiritual/animist beliefs, culture, and love of the natural world.

Thanks again!

Here is the link to the GoogleDoc.

Here's my critique:

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