[1833] Primal Grotesque - version 2

This is the first half (basically Act I) of a short story I'm preparing for Reddit's r/nosleep. I posted my first draft here last week and got some great feedback. What I've posted here is a near-total rewrite based on that feedback.

Hopefully, there's enough here for you to start to get a taste of the creepy and terrifying stuff that's coming. But my questions about the opening are:

- Do you want to keep reading to see what happens?

- Did you want to keep reading after the first 3 or 4 paragraphs? Since this is just one story of dozens that will be posted to busy r/nosleep on the same day, it's going to be evaluated by prospective readers based on the first screenful of text. The first line, maybe. Imagine you're in scrolling-for-a-dopamine-hit mode. Would you read it under those conditions?

- Is there enough creepy foreshadowing? You're supposed to know that some weird stuff is going on and it's going to get weirder

Here is version 2 of Primal Grotesque

And here is My review of [2128] Underworld Mechanization - Chapter 1 Welcome to hell (V4 Rewrite)

[EDIT - Oops typos]