[2497] After Credits (Second Draft)
Hi there,
The Story: After Credits (2nd Draft)
For context or curiosity, I posted a first draft at the beginning of September which desperately needed work. After getting some amazing feedback, I mulled over the story and created a revision guide with the following points:
- Watch out for any inconsistent POV or tense swapping
- Really focus on Daniel's motivation
- Describe the Souls
- Characterize both Daniel and (especially) April
I also experimented with reordering some scenes, deleting some, adding some, etc.
My goal moving forward is to do some page-by-page cutting as well as seek as much feedback as possible. I always have a fear when doing revisions that sometimes, I get caught up in the story's own "meta" and forget to include context or, worst of all, make it worse! I also feel there are still some glaring issues, but I'm wanting to see if they are either a) genuine things that should be addressed or b) my own self-doubt.
I really appreciate anyone who takes the time to look over this piece!
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Critiques:
Posted Sep 26, 2023, 5:13 AM UTC