Who Am I to Speak of Tejano Culture?

Who am I to speak of Tejano culture? Who am I to speak of Hispanics as though I crawled out from the maize?

I am just a Midwestern white women. Born and raised in small town America Spoon fed by a single mother of 4 girls Who am I to witness segregation of Hispanics? Who am I to claim I am now the minority in a city of brown skinned Tejanos? Who am I to be confused with a Spanish speaking light skinned Mexican? Who am I to agree with discrimination of Mexicans that I, myself had witnessed as young privileged white girl in small town America. Discrimination did not exist in my head. My rose tinted glasses through which I view the world. Who am I to marry a second generation Mexican American? Connect my Anglo ancestry with his Tejano roots? Who am I to teach our four beautiful children we are all… in a word… human. Who am I to teach my children of Mexican, English, African, French, Irish and Native American descent that they are equal and different in the same breath? Who am I to empathize with disenfranchised Hispanics of American descent? Who am I to prepare our children for a future of half curious strangers asking ‘where are you from?’ Who am I to question my Hispanic husband when he tells me his family ancestry? Then laugh when we discover that he, in fact, is more Anglo than I? Perfect English, Broken Spanish. Surprise in another’s eyes when I contort my mouth to say ‘Me llamo Crystal. Como puedo ayudarte? I roll my tongue to correctly pronounce Amarillo, then question why northerners still pronounce it as Ama-rill-oh Who am I to immediately recognize every Spanish word in American Context only to realize, I have been saying it wrong my whole life? Who am I to know how to make tamales, papas con chorizo o champurrado? Who am I to know how to make gorditas con huevos y chorizo, and then eat three? Who the hell am I to know how to obnoxiously sing Feliz Navidad. Feliz Navidad y prospero ano y felicidad - and know what I just said? Who am I to feel ashamed when I speak Spanish with a native English tongue? Who the hell am I to avoid speaking to my children in Spanish for fear of ridicule? Who am I to teach my children to be proud of their roots? Their Mexican heritage and Anglo history grown from the soil of their fallen ancestry. Quien Estoy?