[1496] Center of the Universe

Hello DR! My story once again after a few touch ups. I wanna thank everybody who offered a ton of thoughtful and insightful critiques my first draft, as well as the mods who let my admittedly lackluster crits slide (hopefully I’ve punched them up a bit more now.) Some context- this is a self-contained story that’s part of a larger collection of work-travel short stories. Please judge it assuming no future chapters or sequels will exist

That being said, I hope this is a bit more polished than my previous draft. I would love feedback regarding atmosphere and dialogue, as well as characterization of the main character in particular. Thank you all for reading, very grateful to have found this incredibly intelligent and helpful community.

Center of the Universe

Crit- [1550] THE BANK ROBBERY