i am MISERABLE

I hate myself so fuckinh much

I can barely hold it in anymore i don’t even remmebe the last time i didn’t cry over my face on a daily basis i hate my stupid huge nose and everything abiut my face

some days ago i went out with my parents and i felt a bit better about myself after getting ready but as soon as i stepped out of the house and saw how all the other girls looked so effortlessly pretty i started tearing up yes in public, and when we got back to the car i cried the whole way home till i fell asleep

i don’t have high standards in beauty, i don’t need a small nose or big lips of big eyes, i just need regular features, i find almost everyone beautiful bc the average person has normal features, yk a regular sized straight nose, medium eyes, thinner lips, but i know i don’t have features like those, my features are an abomination and i know and it KILLSS ME

i don’t know how much longer i can live like this i don’t wnat to live like this, im not even capable of loving someone else because i hate myself so much more than i will ever love anyone, i am simply filled with hatred and sadness, i am addicted to it

i am an atheist but sometimes i think about turning to christianity just feel like someone out there loves me unconditionally without seeing me for my looks, someone that finds me beautiful no matter what

besides being ugly im not even smart, or a good friend, im poor and the only famiky i have are my parents, i am filled with jealousy and anger, it’s like i was born set for failed i hate it here i hate everyone with a better chance at life than me