Family Court Warning.

Going to try to keep this concise. I am a father that has consistently been the primary provider and caretaker of his children. We were not married. I finally left the situation because amongst other things, she had a very physically violent outburst. This was 5 years ago. At this point I had my children 4/7 days a week and paid $1200/month in daycare costs. She initially took me to court out of spite. Nothing more or less. It ended up turning into mediation during covid which consisted of me being pro se and her lawyer (Aaron mcrea) in a seperate break out room and I wasnt even able to interact with them. The mediator is unbiased and I had no one to advise me and I was driven to settle for 50/50 custody with me paying $1,800.00 month in support and her having the rights to claim them on taxes. The only custody change that happened here was her having them overnights on wednesdays which made her technically have 4/7 overnights.(at this point i was earning under 70k a year) . It ruined me financially but I was fully aware of the kids having daycare expenses etc. And the implication was that it could be modified later on.

2 years ago I filed for emergency custody because she was constantly in breach of the court order and actually hunting down and trying to physically assault the woman I had started to see. She showed up at my house numerous times, caused all sorts of chaos and conflict. I called the police and they basically said since she was outside of my house and not actually inside they could not really do anything. That winter was rough and kids were out of school a lot I had them every cancelled day and as a result I got a few months behind on child support which got my driver's license suspended and also turned my emergency custody hearing into a contempt hearing. At this contempt hearing the custody order was basically denied because "it was interesting that I filed for emergency custody right as I was going into arrears" and she had legal representation etc. The first question the prosecutor asked me was, "if you could pay your bills this winter how come you were unable to take care of your children?" I was flabbergasted and my court appointed counsel was silent. He asked for a continuance and all around everyone was ok until mom said "I missed work for this". At which point I was given a purge payment that if I didnt make it was told I would do up to 180 days in jail. My custody motion was denied and I filed for modification of child support. This was continued 4 times. Mom was fired by previous counsel after I submitted evidence to them. And since hired two other lawyers. At my csup modification the judge did the calculations and said 89$/week was the new ruling unless someone submitted paperwork in the next 10 days otherwise for his review. The prosecutor submitted paperwork saying there should be no modification as well as the mother's lawyer. My motion was denied entirely and the prosecutor essentially acted as the mother's defense. I called every lawyer in Southern Indiana and an appeal would have cost me 10,000$. I sent the mother's lawyer a bunch of information afterwards and she contacted mom and asked questions regarding the information I sent and fired her as well after getting the real information. I am now stuck with the same $1,800.00 month payment, earning less money, and still buy all of my kids necessities. I have gotten current with my child support but my contempt hearing is still drawn out and keeps getting continued. I am barely surviving. And I cannot file for another modification for atleast a calendar year, at which point, I apparently have to prove a change of circumstances from the last hearing. There is no more $1,200.00 in daycare as they are both in a free charter school. Mom earns the same as me and also has recently Inherited over 500k.

It doesn't make sense. And everyone in the legal system seems to have the "it is what it is " attitude.

This system is not implemented for the well being of children. And it is majorly based on fraud and administrative law. If you are considering going to family court for any reason, please consider the impact it may have on your children and try your hardest to find another solution.