How to work with my avoidant partner

Me 28M, Senior Engineer in tech, her 27F Emergency Medicine Resident finishing intern year.

We have been dating since mid February and have been exclusive since mid March. We are both dating intentionally.

Recently she has told me that I am overwhelming her with the following:

1. Sending "good morning/night texts, and 1-2 texts during the day checking in or wishing her good luck on her shift.

On a regular day before this conversation we were exchanging 4-5 texts each and talking on the phone 1-2/week.

She actually asked her friends about this and they told her what I am doing is completely normal, but she still doesn't accept it.

2. Seeing each other too often. I understand she has a more demanding schedule than me, but we see each other 1-2/week. She wants even less time than that.

fyi: We live ~3-4 miles away from each other in a major city and with public transport its a ~20min commute

3. I am showing too much love?

I have written her 1 poem, bought her 1 small bouquet of flowers, and dropped off food a couple times after long shifts. all spaced out in span of 4 months.

4. Having a picture of us as my phone background.

She told me she feels weird about it.

5. She doesn't want me to participate in her hobbies.

6. My way of support isn't supporting her.

She said she understands my checking in, or volunteering to help her with tasks and errands is a way of trying to support her, but she needs time for herself. (is this her being hyper independent / avoidant?)

What have I done:

1. I have reduced my texts to 1 daily update about what I've done and how I am feeling. No asking her about hers or anything. Unless she wants to volunteer that info herself.

2. Right now she is on a trauma schedule (working 28hrs every 3 days), I understand this is draining and I am not demanding more of her time.
   However, I have needs too, after she's back to a more regular schedule I will ask her if its possible to continue seeing each other 2 times a week (3 if we both have the bandwidth). And I am totally ok if some of those times we are with my friends or hers, but still would like once a week just us.

3. Honestly less work for me, but I have so much feelings for her, I don't know how to not show it... For now I am writing the poems and keeping them to myself.

4. Really liked when my phone lit up and I saw her smile next to me, but removed it.

5. She plays soccer and goes to music festivals. I love soccer, but she asked me not to join because it her time with her friends which I respect, only thing is she has asked my friends to join because they are short players....

And with music festivals I am going to one later in the Summer and going to some sets together, but also allowing her to be alone/with friends so she can enjoy both aspects of it.

6. I am giving her space, not chasing. But it is really hard for me to do this long term, I feel so distant from her, and something I want to talk to her about after this crazy rotation where she is more grounded.

How can we make this work?

What can I do? (I am starting therapy as soon as my new insurance is figured out)

What does she need to do and how much of it is my place to guide her to do those things?

I love her and haven't felt like this with anyone before. I want us to make it work.

Please give me any advice or share your experience.

I appreciate it.