30M4F UT/Online eh, I might be talking to bots this whole time 😑

30 about to be 31 in August, Latino, 5'10, Curly black hair, septum, gauges, dirty brown eyes. I don't know what else you may want to know about me.

90% SpongeBob quotes, 10% existential dread, 100% unhinged commitment to both. I will compliment you and call you names in the same breath, I promise it's out of love and comfort.

My sarcasm is practically another language at this point. I know for some people this is a delay breaker since they hate to laugh.

I'd like to say I read a lot but most of the time I just read the labels on my shirts... I listen to a lot of audiobooks tho!

I come with two tiny humans attached, not literally, figuratively. Raised Mormon, not currently practicing, pretty open-minded about most things.

There's a real chance one of us is going to feel like they got the short end of the stick and may be walking straight into a Shrek/Fiona situation. We reserve the right to mutually pretend this never happened. We're cheating on our spouses of course I have to find you attractive! Just as I'm sure you have to find me attractive.

Message me. Tell me you hated this. All in all message me :) you miss every shot you don't take.