Husband left almost 2 weeks ago

My husband is hardly ever home between work and his buddies and his hobbies, and it’s been that way for 10 years. I work part time, so I was the one who did all of the staying out with them sick, school drop off/pick up, appointments, bedtime routines, etc. pretty much me exclusively for 10 years. 2 weeks ago he moved out of the house to live with a friend, and in those two weeks has came and gone back to this house as he pleases every day and has spent more quality time with the kids than he ever did in the past decade they’ve been alive. I thought full physical custody with joint legal would be the least disruptive to the kids lives if we were to file, because that’s what they’ve been used to anyway. Our oldest child told me yesterday she doesn’t want to go back and forth between houses, but I don’t know how much the wishes of the child count for anything in custody. Of course I’d never keep him from seeing them and he could come or take them on trips or whatever. It has been disorienting for them though when he keeps showing up randomly and bringing them a toy or something every day since he left. And if you’re going to leave us, why are we seeing you so much now? Where have you been for 10 years? So on the other hand maybe some kind of schedule would be better? I don’t know…