coming to terms with my past relationship, is this coercion?

TW advice about coercion, mention of trauma

Hello,

I (30F) have been coming to terms with the end of my relationship a year ago. There is one aspect of the relationship I’m really struggling with and need advice as to whether it was coercion.

For context, in my past relationship I would really struggle with sex for periods of time. I have a trauma history and now have discovered that I have ASD, so can struggle with being touched.

In my relationship, my ex (male) did lots to support me but we struggled by the end, especially with intimacy. He said that if he doesn’t have sex, he won’t sleep and if he doesn’t have sleep for 3 days then he will develop psychotic symptoms. He was critical of me for not being ‘supportive’ when he disclosed this, despite knowing that I have trauma history. I tried to make an array of accommodations e.g encouraging him to masturbate, he said he wouldn’t do this while I was in the house because he would feel too guilty. I made offers to stay at mine instead so he could do this, he said no. He said he could masturbate while he watches me and I did honor this but it made me very uncomfortable.

He said he didn’t want to tell me due to the position that it puts me in and still asked for my consent, hence the confusion. My memory is hazy as to whether we had sex following this but I have a feeling we did.

We broke up as his mental health declined and I didn’t ’support him enough’ and his whole family and friends blame me for this, even though it led me to being in crisis with ongoing mental health problems to this day, but that wasn’t taken into consideration. I haven’t told anyone about the contents of this post as part of me wanted to protect him when I knew he was struggling.

I am still affected by this a year later and recently I have been thinking about it more and more. I keep second guessing myself because he asked for my consent and he acknowledged the difficult position it puts me in. However, part of me knows it’s not right.

My question is, would this be classified as coercion?