ER doctors cut wait time and tylenol allergies with free bowl of percocet in waiting room. "Honor system" seems to be working.
gomerblog.com/2014/01/percocet/Posted Mar 14, 2015, 5:29 AM UTC
Posted Mar 14, 2015, 5:29 AM UTC
This is the funniest shit, I've actually been in the ER with a beach towel soaked in blood on my face and had to wait 30 mins for some fat screaming bitch who was arguing with the receptionist because they only gave her a script of naproxen sodium. I've known 2 people to purposefully injure themselves to get pain meds, 1 crippled up his arm by knowingly sticking it in a machine because "life would be so much easier with a few scripts and a government and company check man hell that's all I've ever wanted." fucked up I tells ya
Holy shit. Did he at least get his scripts and what not?
Nah man fraud investigator told him to eat a dick.
Knew a guy who shot himself in the foot for meds. Instead of meds they gave him 5 years in prison.
"At first I was a little cynical of this new plan,” Dr. Harvey told reporters. “I mean most pain patients are allergic to Vicodin, Percocet, Motrin, and Tylenol, therefore –and quite coincidentally- Dilaudid is the only medication that helps with their pain. Was I ever wrong! Last night we had a no-hitter. That is the first on the books.”
funny shit, I remember seeing this posted a while back but that part still makes me laugh.
Haha!! The comments on this story are funny. There's someone who actually thought this was real.
"“They came here demanding ‘Pain Drugs’ so help yourself.”"- I fucking wish!!
"People with sore arms, teeth, ears, frenulums, and chronic abdominal pain will visit local ERs at odd hours for the remote hope that they will be prescribed Percocet; –Dilaudid if the opioid gods find favor them." - looks like we arent the only ones who pray to junkie jesus.
I honestly thought this was real, I am not a smart man.
If only...
This is obviously satire.
Thanks for the heads up. Guess I can skip the trip to my local ER now.
I know it's satire, but do you think they might be wrong about people saying they're allergic to pain meds with Tylenol bc they want dillaudid? I mean, I'm sure a small percentage want dillaudid, but only the people that shoot it. I'm pretty sure dillys aren't that great when ingested orally or nasally. I think people say they're allergic to Tylenol so they can get 10s, 15s, or 30s of oxycodone without Tylenol so they can snort it.
Most people I know that shoot love dillys for shooting but most wouldn't go to an ER and expect a script for pain bc they have track marks.
I went to the ER a few years ago and they discovered I had high liver enzymes so they gave me dillys. In fact, they originally printed me out a script for hydrocodone but changed it upon realizing my liver enzymes were high.
What are you talking about? This article is a joke. Nothing more.
What are you talking about? You really think the article is just a joke and Nothing more? I guess if you aren't familiar with the composition of pills, pill seekers, and the culture of medical professionals, some parts of the article could go over your head.
The satire in article is little more sophisticated than just a bowl of percocets in the waiting room (ie how everyone who is in pain all of the sudden is allergic to Tylenol).
I don't have the time to argue about who knows more about pills and who better understands satire. It's a complex joke and a well written one but your first comment was either a failed attempt to sound smart or a poorly worded and placed attempt to discuss the intricacies of opioid pain management, specifically with regard to emergency room pill seekers. I just don't see what you're trying to get at or what your point is, but don't worry about it because I don't particularly care either.
Oh, it was obvious a failed attempt at trying to sound smart.
No but really, I was merely stating that I don't think pill seekers are always trying to get dillaudid when saying they have Tylenol allergies, but rather just regular plain oxycodone without Tylenol. Then I continued to give a personal anecdote about an experience I had at the ER.
It was just a nice friendly reply to your thread. Then you replied in an extremely rude manner--at least it came off off that way to me.
Anyway, you're right, it's abundantly clear you don't see what my point is. I'm glad you don't particularly care either, maybe now you'll stop making condescending comments directed towards me.
The end.
If only this were true.