Source
r/fatlogic•
thirdham

One thing I've noticed people get so close, yet still so far...

I have some friends who mention about how it's not the size you are but how healthy you are and any body shaming is bad, be it skinny or fat shaming and all, and that you should have a healthy lifestyle "no matter what your size is".

But... if you DO take on a healthy lifestyle, eat the appropriate amount of calories, get your proper micro and macro nutrients, exercise enough and everything, you wouldn't be oversized...

I agree shaming isn't productive, but education is and it seems like a lot of people (specifically the HAES crowd) seem to interpret any type of education as shaming which then leads to further disconnect to the reality that if you eat properly and exercise, you will not be obese and you will get healthier at a more normal size.

Posted Apr 27, 2015, 2:54 AM UTC

3519
dainty_flowerI'm just in obesity remission•

I don't honestly know what constitutes as "shaming" - the word has completely lost all meaning, since it's become this super-subjective concept referring to anything that hurts someone's feelings. It's gotten to the point where every damned thing is called body shaming.

Sorry for the rant, but that word annoys me to no end, because it's over-used to the point where I think the meaning has become dilute to the point of irrelevance.

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thirdhamOPLet the beetus hit the floor, LET THE BEETUS HIT THE FLOOOOORR!!•

No, I agree. That's kind of how i meant when I say how they take education as shaming.

What I guess I mean as shaming is saying "you're a fucking fat ass" or other mean comments that you'd likely see on fatpeoplehate and such the like, dehumanizing things. Same with calling someone skinny or even normal weight an "anorexic bitch". That stuff is shaming. Not telling someone that if they eat less they will lose weight like it seems to have morphed into.

14
wuthers•

The word "fat shaming" has evolved to mean "any combination of words that puts being fat in a negative light". So now it includes people being supportive and helpful AND people who are being dicks.

7
canteloupy•

And it includes factual information like Kaplan-Meier curves...

3
m84m•

Even being supportive about weight loss efforts is now "concern trolling" to these people.

3
m84m•

You think the word shaming is ridiculous? You should see the word 'triggered' these days, just about makes your eyeballs detach from rolling them so hard.

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Steve_the_haxorous•

This is the one that gets me. Every time some tumblr bitch says she is triggered I want to go ballistic. You wanna know what triggered is? My sister was molested for years by a cousin of mine. Family never knew until years later. Few months ago we are chilling watching the news and BAM cousins face pops up. My sisters reaction was "triggered". You can't fake that shit and it isn't "oh I don't like that. It worries me". It is a physical, visceral and terrifying reaction.

4
KnightsFan•

When you've never known real pain, terror or suffering you can easily compare your uncomfortable feeling to what your sister felt.

Also, you should look at getting your sister into counseling so she can learn to handle any other long term effects of the trauma. That is if she hasn't already been seeing one.

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Steve_the_haxorous•

Oh she has been. It has been a long recovery process

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m84m•

The original idea of HAES, I think, correct me if I'm wrong, was that anyone, no matter how fat could take steps to make themselves healthier. Better diet, more exercise, less smoking and drinking. But that was too much effort, so now it's basically just "everyone is healthy, even unhealthy people. Why should I have to change anything, I'm perfectly healthy already!" But the core problem is of course the same as it ever was, obese people don't exercise, don't eat well, or generally take any steps to actively improve their lives. I I believe there was a study recently that obese people generally exercise for 1 hour per year. Yes per year.

So yeah, an obese person who eats healthy food, in moderation, and exercises frequently will be healthier than one who doesn't, but how many obese people actually do that? Virtually none, that's why they're obese.

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mytwocats11•

Some obese people do BUT you'll find those people disappearing from the obese category over time. It's a starting point (obese) but not the end for people who don't stop eating less and exercising more.

2
m84m•

Yep, which kinda renders the entire "at every size" aspect of it moot anyway. If you do eat healthy, exercise frequently, you won't just continue to be "obese and healthy" forever, eventually you'll just be normal weight but healthy.

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mytwocats11•

Precisely. My health is changing but so is my size.

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mytwocats11•

And if it doesn't happen you're probably doing something wrong. I used to think I had some sort of condition too...then I realized how bad I was about estimating my consumption.

1
Steve_the_haxorous•

There was a newer study that out of 209 listed activities something like 30% of people had done NONE of them. Leading scientists to label them as completely inactive. These are the same people who claim to be on par with Olympic athletes. Spoiler: you're not. My university was a top swimming school and hosted the NCAA champs. I met Olympic athletes. And gold medal holders. They are on a whole different level.

1
SekineMachine•

I think some shaming can be productive. I've seen groups of friends effectively call each other out on smoking too much, drinking too much or other detrimental behaviors. It's a fine line but I think it's possible.

3
wolverine_wannabe•

HAES became bastardized into "Healthy at Every Size" (NO!) instead of "Health at Every Size" which meant engaging in health-wise behaviors such as proper eating and exercise WHICH WOULD THEN greatly reduce size to a healthy point.

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ParadiseSold•

YSK that having a healthy lifestyle will make you lose weight, but it still takes a year to lose 100lbs. So yes, she could be getting her proper nutrients and still be overweight for a while.

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thirdhamOPLet the beetus hit the floor, LET THE BEETUS HIT THE FLOOOOORR!!•

I know. I do mean in time and all.

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