Hot romances with decent characters

I'm normally a sci-fi, fantasy, and sometimes mystery reader (and listener), but I'd like to branch out into romances. My problem is that the couple I've picked up on my own have generally ranged from mediocre to terrible.

The exception was the Kushiel's Legacy series by Jacqueline Carey, which I enjoyed a lot. I read that series in print, so I'm not sure how the audiobook versions were.

Part of my problem is that the male leads in most of the romance books I've happened across are terrible people. I listened to the first book of the Crossfire series by Sylvia Day (Bared to You). The sex scenes were good, and I liked the narration, but the main love interest comes across as a terrible, abusive guy. I just can't deal with the way the characters behave towards each other.

I also picked up some of the "In Death" series by Nora Roberts (writing as JD Robb). It feels like it's trying to be a hybrid romance / sci-fi / mystery series, which sounded great. Unfortunately, the sex scenes aren't actually that great, nor is the science part of the science fiction, and the mysteries are only okay. And again, the main romantic lead comes across as being right on the edge of being an abusive jerk (at least in the first couple of books).

So, r/audiobooks, help me out. I'm looking for plenty of hot sex scenes, good narration, and main characters who are actually decent human beings. A series with lots of books is also a plus.

Edit: It's not just that the male leads are abusive that bothers me, but that the books seem to glorify and excuse the behavior. I'm fine with bad people either being reformed by the love of a good woman or getting their ass kicked for their behavior.