When to say 'I love you'?
So I met my boyfriend on the internet just 5 days ago and he's perfect... I love him so much already.
I just don't know when to say it. I said it quietly to him on a Skype call yesterday but I think he fell asleep :) I'm hopefully going to meet him for a weekend in 3 weeks so I could say it then but that seems like so long away... I have such strong feelings for him now (and I'm almost certain he has them for me too) I just want to tell him noww, it'll feel so right. So yeah, I need advice should I wait until the perfect moment in real life when I meet him or should I go for it and tell him? Any advice would be appreciated <3
(Also, I can't thank this sub enough for all the help it's given me, you guys are awesome :)
Posted Nov 5, 2015, 9:43 AM UTC
Well then.. that's seems a bit rushed, doesn't it? Look, I don't want to bring you down or anything, but there's a difference between 'loving someone' and 'liking someone a lot'. Quite a big difference, actually, if you ask me. I feel like if you jump to 'I love you' the first time you guys meet, that might kinda depreciate what 'loving someone' means. Loving someone is the top of the mountain, it's the summit of a relationship. Usually people feel like they love someone when they're a couple of months into a relationship, when they've gotten to know the person really well. Once you've been through various situations with that person and you've seen all his sides, that's when you get to say you love someone.
But hey, if you absolutely feel this way and think you know the guy well enough to tell him 'I love you', wait for it to be in person. Then at least there's some value left over sending him a text declaring your love.
Well me and my boyfriend said we love each other a few days into the relationship. Well he said it that night we started dating and I said it the next day. But the point is that we really do love each other.
Sure you do, and I'm not saying it's impossible. I'm just saying it's highly unlikely you really know someone well enough to know you love them at such an early stage. In the end it's just words and it shouldn't control how a relationship takes it course. But I do think, as you get older, saying 'I love you' too early might be considered a red flag. For me personally it'd certainly be a massive red flag and hard to overcome in an early stage relationship.
I know where you are coming from, and I have tried thinking that way too when we started dating. But it doesn't matter if I say it too early if I really do. 4 months we have been together and I have seen the worst of him and he has seen the worst of me. But those flaws and everything he does makes me love him more and more.
I'm happy for you!