I just re-read your poem, and have to say that I take back what I said about the ending. Its fantastic. I dont actually know what I was thinking saying that O.o

Its poignant and ties that whole thing together. Best of all it's so acutely nostalgic but comes across and being very genuine, and un-forced.

Whooo, yea I apologize. I dont think you should change anything. Seriously good stuff.

Keeeep shaaaring :D

Thank you. You're very much right about it being nostalgic, as I explained in my other reply. I feel perhaps it could've had another stanza in between the 2nd and 3rd, so maybe that would have changed things up a bit, but at some point I just wanted to share something because I've never really had the courage to do so before. The ending is very much a personal one, though the imagery is a lot more ambiguous than the rest of the piece, so I understand why it didn't grip you in the same way.

Ouuh great flow! I found this piece really easy to get into, as the images which it elicited produced a nostalgic feeling.

The only critique I have is that the ending has less of an impact for me than the rest of the piece.

its good, keep at it. its hard to ever be 100% content and people are always going to give negative feedback but you just have to listen to yourself mainly and take peoples feedback with a grain of salt. in the end it's for you, not them

Thank you. I actually felt as though I wanted another stanza, but my sister encouraged me to leave it as is (I do have a lot of issues with being satisfied with my work, I've only picked up poetry this last week, because I've always been afraid of not being any good at it before). The poem is actually about childhood days at my grandparent's house, something I wanted to write about because they both passed away rather unexpectedly a month ago, one after the other, and I've been having issues coping with feeling guilty about them having taken care of me in their latter years, when I was supposed to take care of them towards the end (as I've been struggling with depression for a long time). Hence this is an homage of sorts to a time without those fears, and what I feel they would have taught me if they were here now, even though it's hard to stay true to that sentiment.

I like it, good description. I think maybe if you wanted to you could even add another block between the second and third, stating how you feel about these things and how your feelings and views changed as you began to grow. Hence leading up to the last lines. 

Thank you. That goes in line with what others have suggested as well, so I'll try to keep that in mind.

 I think this all runs together really well. I think the ending would have more of an impact if you added another stanza to allow the reader to get more involved - it would probably help the reader appreciate the importance of the last part to you, also.

Thank you for the kind words! Did you know that the word amateur comes from old french for "lover of"? You keep on writing as well; I think passion is something the world can never have enough of.

This is some good poetry right here :D   
Now I'm not an expert, I'm barely an amateur, but I have to disagree with the rest of the comments, because for me the ending is perfect, it gives just enough information and emotions and everything more would be too much for me. Keep on writting ;)

I remember that great pine,  
dwarfing  
the uniformed shrubbery  
which patrolled the ends of our kingdom,  
a pallid countenance  
on the vaulted sky  
of my lucid childhood scene  
&amp;nbsp;  
I remember our yellow castle,  
the Monte Carlo to my Monégasque dream,  
as bright and vivid  
as any golden star  
over any stretching teen  
&amp;nbsp;  
Those pieces of my soul,  
which I there would give away,  
you told me not to free  
and I kept them  
'til today  
&amp;nbsp;  

**Feedback:**

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/466ayk/three_wordsonnets_a_study_in_minimalism/d02te3a?context=3

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/466sab/why_do_i/d03964w?context=3

Another Reflection