#the surface 

Whenever I read your poetry, squirrel, I'm always struck by how expertly you straddle the line between being too vague and not showing us enough, and being too obvious and telling us too much.  This is no exception, and is a fine addition to your portfolio because of it.  

This is a piece about paradox.  The subject is described in completely contradictory ways: "impulsive yet thoughtful", "wise yet young", "worldly not traveled", "the push and the pull", "the sense and the non(sense)", etc.  On the surface, this seems to be leading up to a reveal of some sort which would help us make sense of the paradoxes presented.  And whenever an author works with paradox, this is important part of the payoff of such a mechanic.  We *need* to have some way of resolving the paradox logically, when viewed through a certain lens, or turned about in a certain way.  

My problem with this part of the text is that never happens.   And because there's no lens through which to resolve the 

This raced over my head completely, although you managed to hammer in your passion for our mysterious male very forcefully. I thought "here and gone" seemed cliched without a clear parallel in the body of the poem, although as i mentioned, the parallel may be clear to everyone but me as this poem gave me a reverse mohawk during its speed run over my head. 

Right you are! I will work to eradicate that cliché and also see if I can make this poem more accessible. The death of a friend is hard to translate into digestible terms.

    Impulsive and thoughtful
    Wise yet young
    Worldly not traveled
    
    Always with him
    The push and the pull
    The sense and the non
    
    Embodied in him
    Rooted in him
    
    Bring him to me
    Bring him to me
    
    The effort he took
    For the richness he gave
    The treasures he made forged from his way
    
    That the beauty of this man could make itself known
    In all that I seed upon this earth
    In all that seems small until looked at again
    
    wind and sky
    bugs and trees
    
    Will bring him to me
    Will bring him to me
    
    Yesterday
    Yesterday
    Here and gone

[1](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/51ou8u/september/d7e453b?context=3)    [2](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/51cbqi/kiss_me_like_this/d7c220y?context=3)

My Druid, My Dionysus