The Royal Catfight Series Round 1 Wrap-Up

Casual

As usual, before we proceed to the next round, I’d like to remind everyone that this whole thing is meant to be for fun, you idiots, rather than being a series of screaming matches that end up with hurt feelings. If you’re not having fun, you’re doing it wrong. That said, the vast majority of you have made excellent contributions to this tournament thus far.

Another reminder: even though the participants were selected based on the fact that they’re all potential romantic partners for lords, you do not need to argue based on their presumed romantic relationship. Using Elincia’s relationship with Geoffrey for a point (either for or against her) is just as valid as using her relationship with Ike or using something that’s entirely unrelated to any romance at all.

Here’s a reminder as to how the scoring system works - high-effort comments are worth more than medium-effort which are worth more than low-effort comments. You’ll find the tallies under each match below.

Also, for future reference, the twenty-comment-deep back-and-forths? Yeah, those are tedious for me to read and are unlikely to really earn you any points unless there are some snappy comebacks in there. “Hey guys, is Soren a dick or not? Is his dickness or lack thereof justified? What is dick?” I don’t fucking care, dude, I just care that you can succinctly call him a dick or defend him from such dick allegations.

On a related note, stop replying to every comment in the entire thread! It’s not earning you points, it’s just ticking me off. Not naming names, but you know who you are.

All that aside, I’m proud of you as usual, r/fireemblem. Keep up the good work. And, please… try to keep your salt that your favourite lost in Round 1 in this thread rather than carrying it over into Round 2.

#---

Seth vs. Celica

For Seth/Against Celica
High-Effort: IIIIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIII

For Celica/Against Seth
High-Effort: III
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: I

Celica puts up a surprisingly good fight but is unable to completely follow through. Seth wins this match, to the shock of absolutely probably no one.

#---

Azura vs. Julia

For Azura/Against Julia
High-Effort: IIIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIII

For Julia/Against Azura
High-Effort: IIIIIIIIIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIII

Despite the best efforts of a small corps of Azura fans, the lady of the lake falls pretty handily to the scion of Naga. But for the low, low price of $19.99, you can download the path where Azura doesn’t lose!

…Maybe if I keep making that joke, it’ll wrap back around to being funny again.

#---

Tana vs. Sumia

For Tana/Against Sumia
High-Effort: IIIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIIII

For Sumia/Against Tana
High-Effort: III
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIIIIII

A fairly close one, but Tana ekes it out. Gotta say, though, many of you seemed to let your feelings get in the way of the trash-talking; not many sick burns in this match. #---

Nanna vs. Lilina

For Nanna/Against Lilina
High-Effort: IIIIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIIII

For Lilina/Against Nanna
High-Effort: IIIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIII

Closer still! Lilina just barely beats Nanna.

Welp, there goes my personal stake in the tournament. What is it about my favourites and never making it out of Round 1? #---

Caeda vs. Deirdre

For Caeda/Against Deirdre
High-Effort: IIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

For Deirdre/Against Caeda
High-Effort: I
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: II

Stop, stop! She’s already dead!

…Again!

#---

Ninian vs. Sothe

For Ninian/Against Sothe
High-Effort: IIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIII

For Sothe/Against Ninian
High-Effort: II
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIII

The close matches continue. Maybe if not for the crop top, Sothe could’ve pulled it off.

#---

Soren vs. Farina

For Soren/Against Farina
High-Effort: IIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIII

For Farina/Against Soren
High-Effort: III
Mid-Effort: IIIIII
Low-Effort: III

I mean… she did better than I expected, I guess? I suppose the Ikebowl was just fated to happen.

#---

Elincia vs. Rath

For Elincia/Against Rath
High-Effort: IIIIIIII
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIIIIIIII
Low-Effort: IIIIIIIIIII

For Rath/Against Elincia
High-Effort: II
Mid-Effort: IIIIIIII
Low-Effort: III

Fuck’s sake, this is why you people should’ve voted for Florina. Sure, it’d be another pegasus knight in the running, but at least we could’ve avoided this senseless slaughter.

#---

#All that said, the Round 2 bracket looks like THIS! The first match of the round, Seth vs. Julia, will be posted at 3 p.m. EST today. Good luck to everyone!

Posted Sep 20, 2016, 3:15 PM UTC

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