Notes from English lecture, March 8th

This feedback is going to be extremely basic and is not going to address your content very much, but I think you should consider whether or not it's important to your poem that it is unpleasant and difficult to read on the most basic level. If it is, you have certainly achieved that goal. However, if this poem is not intended to be difficult and to put up a wall between the reader and your meaning, then I think you should consider reworking your form into something different.

What you have here is visual art and not necessarily a poem.

Even Joyce only did a 100 characters at a time bro. Something like this could be excusable (to self-flagellaters) at the end of a po-mo long form piece, but this is hard for me to even convince myself to sit down and read (let alone analyze)

I had a good laugh. This is pretty much what all my school notes resemble after Im done scrawling. Anywho, as a poem its..... interesting? You could always make a doc and format a sweet shape poem outta all those words.

what dirtylizard said. this looks like it could be a word cloud or function better as visual poetry.

i read different sections of it, sorta like a pollock piece. my ex told me that every part of the canvas was equally important, and that's how i treated this. every section is equally important. doesn't mean i immensely enjoyed it in this form - i think it can benefit from a different interpretation as opposed to just wall of text.

I like it. I like it like this too.

machinery over-------- humanity totalitarian control churrent trend or dystopian current trend or dystopian darkness be the[illegible]domination internalization over the hum and ates back to the Bible that the eye result sin a dystopian for humanity to lose its sight and ultimate dystopia reflected in the hum an eye you never see thee ye blink wet urn now to the actual city Los Angeles covered bye labor ate paraphernalia when Deck ard per sues the camera bombarded by bodies milling around in front of the lens the only sound we hear are the Siri like of blinking neon uncommunicative humans to lights of surrounding buildings flush contrasted by to suggest its dystopia again supplanted human vitality the contrast between the Tyrell head quarters and dwarfs all the surrounding buildings which are them selves massive impressives cope more human than human reflected in its architecture intrinsic appropriated human animalistic PhD student that's my jam archetype of the film noir woman film noir film noir was a genre The Maltese Falcon A Touch of Evil expressionism remember German Expressionism German Expression lurking bold and alarming representations of women 3 types 1 Good Woman 2[woman who ties the hero down]

3 Femme Fatale alcoholic private eyes sprawling dead on the floor every hair in place Spiderwoman a brutal hero antihero

incidental scenes trope in the fourth sector fit them old to dissemble seduce and ultimately kill pleasure and murder respectively unimposing intellectual levels cape goats spin stereo types the serpent that once corrupt edman of her nature Hoverstone IWakeUp Screaming stand ard equip mentroles noodle sellers fish scales t and s rich elites surmise ostensibly reproductive duties of the colonial project hard labour sex or killing usable parts nebbish you experiment nothing moreIam the business scantily cladshot mannequins no physic alp resent mothers friends semblance of nuturing incongruity violent rejection off emale creationism be tween her thigh sspider eggs devoured by he reggs devoured by her matricini ecerede fine d and that sit for today infused with hum an iron y butt heiron y so called humanity failed capacity to feel fort he other numbness and heightened anxiet y

may i ask what you think is poetic about this?
not trying to be rude, just curious.