5-7-5
Posted Nov 22, 2017, 1:45 PM UTC
4510
I love this! Oh my goodness this is so clever and unique.
2
this is incredibly lovely! I think humor and poetry can compliment each other so well, and you really nailed it here. the third line popped into my head perfectly, the first two lines were completely natural, and I'm in awe of the execution. wonderful job :)
2
Thank you for the great comments everyone, they are much appreciated. To avoid cluttering the scene (in the service of art, yo!) I won't individually reply :)
2
New to haiku, but this seems to be a consciousness-raiser. :)
2
###Attention:
This comment has been flagged as low-effort feedback. Feedback should address some aspect, mechanic, or quality of the poem, and make an attempt to help the author understand your reaction to it. It should represent a good faith attempt to help the author improve as a poet.
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2
your delivery in this was excellent I really love how you started off and then
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1
This is hilarious! Thanks for making me smile :)
0
well if this isnt one of the most clever haiku’s ive seen. the execution was great