Wowie nice imagery. A really uplifting poem. However I feel like you should end it with some dark lines. A touch of reality to the dreams. Yeah yeah I know I love dark poetry. Can't really help it. 

The gleeful chatter of youth after a long class,
chairs screaming 'disrespect' as they rush out of the room.
Making happy faces into phones at the end of a half-day,
may it never die;
this magic in our eyes.
The imagery here is perfect. It is really touching. Show's the naivity of youth

Thanks for the feedback! I have looked into haiku not really tanka though. I'll give it a shot. :)

Thanks for the feedback! I thought I could dress up the sound a bit with punctuation, guess it wasn't that effective. I'll work on it

I love the description in this poem. I felt like I could see the seen that you are writing about. details like the hanging lid of the trash bin are great for this. you might try testing out syllable counts for each line it might help it flow a little better while reading :-)

Thanks for the feedback 😋. I'll work on the flow.

Very good descriptively ! I could really see the images i think you were trying to get off the page, constructive criticism to you from me would be gaining a more proficient flow.  

this is a very innocent poem but I love the disrespectful chairs. I feel like it needs something else but I like it very much


Pink petals spread across a sun-burnt roof,

the gentle wind, carrying them to new home.

The hanging lid of a trash bin

yearning to fulfill its purpose.

The gleeful chatter of youth after a long class,

chairs screaming 'disrespect' as they rush out of the room.

Making happy faces into phones at the end of a half-day,

may it never die;

this magic in our eyes.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/844iyj/they_lie/dvmqc6g/

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/843kx8/spectre/dvmqsfj/

Tuesday.