Source
r/MtF•
MyDamnBlog

(TW: Alcoholism) I poured all my alcohol down the drain.

I quit drinking months ago, I was abusing it and using it as a crutch, a way to stop feeling when dysphoria and depression got too bad. But I could never get rid of my supply, just in case I needed it. Well, after a bad, hard night where all I wanted to do was drink again, I decided enough was enough. As soon as I got home from work, I poured every drop of alcohol I have down the drain. I don't need it anymore. It isn't for me. I am myself now and I don't need that crutch anymore. Thank you r/MtF, and some amazing people I have met here. Without you, I don't know where I would be today. Now I am at one of the moments I am proudest of myself.

Posted Mar 13, 2018, 9:34 PM UTC

17427
JoanShortTransgender•

Well done. The first two weeks are the hardest. Don't be afraid to call AA or to use this group if you feel the urge. You should notice better sleep soon, better everything. And thanks for letting us know. Vulnerability can be your shield.

25
txteachertransAshley | 40 | HRT 1/31/18•

OP hasn't touched a drop in four months, though...

5
axvld26/pre-everything•

Still a relevant comment for other people who might be reading.

6
bipolarSamanth0rOver a decade HRT•

Alcoholism doesn't go away after 4 months or however long you're sober. I've been sober 7 years and still had to call my sponsor last week.

3
txteachertransAshley | 40 | HRT 1/31/18•

It just seemed like the person above me was under the impression that OP had just now quit drinking and was saying "The first two weeks are the hardest...if you need help during these first two weeks, let know know."

1
JoanShortTransgender•

very well done. I'm celebrating :)

1
axvld26/pre-everything•

Oh hey, I did that yesterday. I don't necessarily plan to cut it out completely and forever, but I was going through a period of really bad depression and dysphoria and noticed myself starting to develop a pretty irresponsible pattern. Figured I'd cut myself off for a little while and try to break the pattern.

6
hoshi30MtF | FFS, SRS•

Alcohol is expensive too. Lots of money will be saved when you stop spending money on drinks. Now you can use that money for more productive things instead (like your transition)

3
FinallyCharlotte•

Good for you. I haven’t had a drink in two years. It only made things much worse. I don’t miss alcohol at all now. You can do it! Stay strong.

C

2
AlyNsuchTrans Woman | 25 | HRT 3/15/2018 | USA•

That's awesome sister! It is always so inspiring to hear others overcome these types of personal struggles. I'm glad you were able to make that decision for yourself. In a few weeks, you probably won't even think about having a drink.

I too have struggled with alcoholism to cope with my dysphoria and depression. It got so bad that my doctor told me I had to stop drinking for a month or else run the risk of damaging my liver. I used that mandate as an excuse to begin a long period of total sobriety, but then the dysphoria eventually broke me down and I returned to drinking. Now I just limit myself to drinking on the weekends. As I get happier, I feel the need to drink less and less. Plus, cutting out the alcohol really helped me lose weight!

2
commissarcorgi96•

Awesome that's amazing

2
winnipegcdBiromantic Lesbian Trans Lady•

Good for you!!! I am extremely proud of you! I have struggled with alcohol abuse off and on (its really complicated to explain what I mean by this) in the past myself and I know how hard it is to make a strong decision like that!! Good going girl!

I wanted to leave a reminder though that if somewhere down the line you slip, remember not to define yourself by the slip, define yourself by moments like this one!

2
EnabledHorizonMikela - 25, E 10/4/2017•

Hey girl! I just hit 4 months today. You can reach out to me if you need to!

2
n0p3rs14|Blockers~4/18/18•

I’m so happy for you! Reach for the skies!

2
pmaimbourg23 | HRT 03-19-18•

Congratulations! I'm learning this is a very hard process and as a recovering alcoholic/drug addict(only 4 months sober), starting to transition has been especially hard because of wanting to escape feelings. You're not alone <3

2
UnicornShimmer•

Way to go girl! This is so inspiring, and such a deep expression and connection with the love and compassion you hold for yourself. Thank you for sharing, I just hit a similar point myself and made a similar decision. Much love to you <3

2
Jamie_Suzanne36 | F | HRT 9/29/2017•

Congratulations, Tiana. We're proud of you too. hugs

2
bralra•

Congrats OP! Stay strong, I'm an ex drinker myself if you ever feel like you need some support.

2
Atorm58731 MtF HRT 5/15/17•

I started drinking at 29 years old to cope with my dysphoria. After I accepted myself as trans and decided to stop fighting, I suddenly started developing alcohol intolerance. Maybe my body was trying to tell me something? Not sure. I have no doubt had I not transitioned I would have either moved onto harder drugs to cope or committed suicide.

2
ZebraLord7Mina, MtF, Hrt since 2/2/18•

3 months here. It's much better now tbh

2
scene_missing•

That’s cool as shit! Congratulations OP!! You’re on your way to a better life

2
older_bolderTerra - Punk'n'Spice •

Hell yes, sister. One day at a time. <3

1
Kenna193Transgender•

Good job! There are plenty of other things to do that are health(ier) coping mechanisms! Like working out or cooking, or eating a large fry from McDonald's with honey... No one's judging!

1
mostghostbusterF•

That's awesome! I haven't drank in 4 years and know how difficult quitting can be. My life is a zillion times better without alcohol. You've made a really good decision!

1
heart_johnson•

Fuck yeah, own your life. We're all rooting for you!

1