Money Saving tip: A human anus can warm a sausage to 37 degrees celsius
Posted Apr 10, 2009, 4:34 PM UTC
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is that the wurst thing that can happen?
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Stop being such a brat.
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Andouille really need all these puns?
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I'd like to see some more links.
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Summer just rickrolls, so be careful.
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Weiner!
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weiner, weiner, chicken deiner...
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Nice try BBQ-flavored astroglide producers.
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This is stupid. Most frugal people's assholes are way too tight for that.
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this is single handedly the funniest thing i've read this week. thank you.
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in these hard times, you do what you can to get by, and you owe it to people to share the things you learn
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Did you learn it the 'hard' way? I also have a question about preparing meals for groups. For a group of say 10 people does each one prepare thier own or does one person get selected to shove the wieners up his/her ass.
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To best answer this question, one must know the starting temperature of each sausage. This is the unknown variable, which taken into account with the second law of thermodynamics (in an isolated system internal portions at different temperatures will tend to adjust to a single uniform temperature and thus produce equilibrium) and the importance of maintaining a core body temperature, can have dramatic implications.
If one person is selected to be the "oven" and his/her core body temperature drops to 91-94.8°F, then the confusion and mis-coordination that ensues may make it more difficult to insert the next sausage. Then again, many people enjoy catching greased-up pigs, but I digress. As a matter of safety as well as considering the potential for fun, I would suggest that the group split into groups of (2) whereby one person is the cook and the other is the oven.
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And if there are children attending would you cut the wieners in half?
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You form a sausage ring.
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Extra Super Money Saving tip: A human anus can produce a warm sausage
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As disgusting as this sounds, the image that popped into my mind was Ronco attempting to sell a sausage casing/stuffing implement that attaches to the human anus.
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This is on my front page...
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This may be true, however the second row of teeth in a vagina will ensure that it doesn't fall out when bending at the waist.
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"What the fuck is that shit?!" "Actually it's sausage."
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How long does it take though?
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About 7 inches I would guess, but that's pushing it.
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Lol, comment of the day award goes to you.
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Sorry I guess my question wasn't in laymen terms. What amount of time does it take to heat a sausage in your anus to 37 degrees celsius which is also 98.6 degrees fahrenheit?
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Wait, you're serious, aren't you?
Well, let's find out! Let's assume the sausage is frozen, so we're bring it up 37 degrees. Your body produces about 125 joules of energy.
Time = ((Heat Capacity of Sausage) x (37) / (125)
Does anybody know the heat capacity of a standard sausage?
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Does anybody know the heat capacity of a standard sausage?
African or European?
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2.34 KJ/kg°C according to this (if it's unfrozen).
Edit: I don't think that equation is correct, Newton's Law of Cooling would be more appropriate. I don't have the heat transfer coefficient of a sausage in an anus though.
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Nice formula you got there, I like your style.
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screw you, toaster oven! I'm cooking on my own, now!
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Huh... I've just been doing it for fun this whole time.
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look____of____disapproval clearly approves.
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^_^
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this was f*cking stupid
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Butt my penis is still cold. How can… oh. Neat!
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Next defense we will hear from those anti gay people caught the pants down.
"I am not gay, I was only trying to keep my dick warm"
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SOMEONE ELSE'S human anus can warm a sausage to 37*C
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well it won't be cooked but i guess warm sausage is better than cold sausage. Maybe this is just to preheat or thaw. Does this technique work on anything else?
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- Cucumbers
- Squash
- Ears of corn
- Candy canes
- Ice cream cones
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- Whole fish
- French bread
- Carrots
- Porkloin
- My dick
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- Golf club
- Baseball bat
- Arm
- Boa Constrictor
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- Gerbils
Don't forget gerbils.
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You can also save money on a warm, cozy bed and cut farming costs by splitting open your cattle and sleeping inside.
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That is only economically advantageous if its a taun-taun.
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Thanks for reminding me of that ace ventura rhino scene
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Brings a whole new meaning to bangers and mash
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The colon would make it hotter.
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that's fucking gross, dude. WTF, the quality of reddit is deteriorating enough as it is
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Neat! The sausages end up tasting a little funny but hey, im saving money!
EXPERT NOTE: If you have to, try to poop before you anally warm a cold sausage.
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Jees, you're no expert. Corndog anyone? With real corn.
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ಠ_ಠ
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Ah, crap.
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You lost.
You're like Superman. Always there when we really need you. Do not stop, look_of_disapproval. Do not stop.
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I love you, look of disapproval :)
wow - I love how this never gets old.
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Analy cooked sausage? It's more common than you think.