Would really appreciate some feedback/critique :)! To Be or Not to Be (Fathers)

To be or not to be? That is the question--no, the choice, tucked away and burning inside every moment of our shared existence.

I ask it of myself when you drift by unannounced and casual-like from the corner I’ve allotted you in my stash of dreams and traumas. It is certainly the odd luck of fair weather that brings in estranged company.

At the edge of the abstract jungle, I’m watching fathers play with their sons. Your face appears in theirs like a haunt, and I can’t help but feel the slightest tinge of envy. Like a slow violent acid bitterly bubbling on its way along the back of my throat.

Today’s poison is calling. It tasks my dried-out hands to work; To fold you back into tolerable shapes and shadows and place you inside the oblivion of id. So I do it -- and I do it wondering if my penchant for self-destruction is my own or if it’s something I inherited from you.

I want to know, Daddy. I want to know! What space do I occupy in your malcontent mind? Where do I reside inside your brittle heart? That red and rotting blood machine? Or perhaps it’s made of gold and objectively true? It’s a thing I can’t ever intuit despitebeing half of my father.

When you finally stick your shattered parts back together, and make peace with the cold world that broke you let me know and you can say to me whether you’d like to be or not to be.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/8ic8v4/to_keep_my_heart_from_flying/

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/8ib2q7/reynardine/