I really like it!! And I actually did appreciate the many colors listed in the beginning. This poem has a sharp, prickly tone, and I think the extra long color intro helps build up to that. Having just black, white, and brown, would make this metaphor too literal, too obvious in my opinion. 

Love the social commentary on this piece! I do wish there were some kind of transition into the "eat, breathe, shit, die" in the first stanza. It also seems to end very short. I appreciated the structure the most outside of the metaphor in this poem.

Hey,

I would suggest removing some of the colors at the beginning, or even all of them. It doesn't really contribute much to the poem honestly, and I just skipped reading them tbh.

Perhaps keep two or three, White, Brown, Black I think would be quite relevant to this piece.

The message is quite clear; but it sort of reads like an article, or a rant; rather than a poem. That's simply my opinion; don't take it too seriously. I am rather drunk.

Do you think it's mean if someone wears a shirt in public that says "No, I'm actually not superior to you due to having slightly different size fingernails"?


Is it mean to say you're not racist? Just asking for a friend

Brown  
Yellow  
Clear  
Green  
Red  
Black  
White  
These colors we share  
Does the color of the sheep affect the quality of the wool?  
Wrapped different, inside the same  
Eat  
Breathe  
Shit  
D  
 i  
  e  
All different, all equal  
Resist, stay unique but inspire change  
Because  
Eat  
Breathe  
Shit  
D  
 i  
  e  
The sheep are all the same


//

This is formatted as center justifed usually hence the long single stanza 

    
1:   https://www.reddit.com/r/ocpoetry/comments/8im1pf/_/dyyk7sf

2: https://www.reddit.com/r/ocpoetry/comments/8irxhk/_/dyyjqm5

Differently Equal