Holy Sonnet: Sketching Temptation

This tumor runs along my neck and head,

glows green with ooze familiar, so ingrain'd

and tied unto my soul, so filled with dread

that it my past--and future, now!--might paint.

In youth it sought me out like vulture preys;

Directionless, alone--prolongéd now?

This old hypertrophy's initial bray's

now slower: quiet whisper, raise of brow.

And I, reluctant being, look anew

and find within my heart Your pencil sat,

A greater waiting invitation. You

show now how I may choose: a crow or rat.

The paper is embossed with wings and claws

But I find victory by taking pause.

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I've written just a handful of pieces for myself, but this is the first I've shared. Total novice; I learned the basics in high school English classes and have a couple collections of the works of my favorite poets, but it's only an infrequent hobby.

EDIT:: I wanted to improve and clarify some parts based on feedback, but wanted to leave the original, so here's version 2:

This tumor runs along my neck and head,

glows green with ooze familiar, so ingrained

and tied unto my soul, so filled with dread

that taints my future, putting on past paint.

In youth it sought me out like vulture preys;

I was directionless, alone (still now?).

This old hypertrophy's initial bray's

now slower: quiet whisper, raise of brow.

And I, distrusting it, then look into

my pining heart to see Your pencil sat.

Awaiting my relent, You show me two

new views of this: death's crow, or trap'ble rat.

The page seems pre-embossed with blackbird's claws

But I find victory by choosing pause.