About Us

That would be a great title for a relationship poem- but it is actually for the About Us page on my website. I have a couple books and I'm trying to sell them not on Amazon- so I'm trying to make my own website and include poetry in the website content. Here is the site if you want to check it out: thecaretree.com . On the About Us page I've got a short origin story of how I started writing poetry- it's almost where I want it, but I'd appreciate feedback. Especially on line breaks and punctuation- when I read it to myself it sounds good, but I know the cadence I want. Not sure if others would read it the same way.

Thanks!

Staring at another invite

To an open Mic night

Wondering why

it didn’t feel right

Until he realized

He didn’t have to

just stand by.

He could try. Himself.

Create something to share,

Overcome all the scares

Take a breath, make a leap

Make that dare

He can’t sing

But who cares?

He should speak.

He would share-

And could answer

that question

for everyone there-

“Who cares?”

I do.

I care.

Feedback:

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/8xckkw/gee\_dash\_dee/e22zmgq

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/8x32cq/a\_poem\_im\_stuck\_on\_please\_help/e230fcp