How maining Vel'koz ruins league.

So i mained vel'koz for years and today i'm going to talk to you about why that is unlikely to ever change, this is what playing vel'koz for thousands of games does to you.

So i'm in champ select, i'm first pick mid i can play quite a few mid champs to a decent level buttt vel'koz can pretty much handle any lane and landing Q is so rewarding it's actually insane, that feeling of bending q around a creep wave at the most absurd angle and then pulling off those crazy beam splits mutiple times until you can actually see the tilted player across from you. Or when you are bullying them under tower and then just laser them for the hell of it saliva frothing from your mouth.

How you just obliterate the creep wave in 2 abilities which allows you to harass your opponent under tower like a chilled shooting gallery where you feel like a cat molesting a mouse.

How you split the beam with the opponents dash considered and they dash into certain doom as your aim is too godlike and they have never witnessed such skillshot mastery.

How you get the feeling your opponent believes their champion counters yours but in reality they are one second away from certain DISINTEGRATION.

How you oneshot a darius player with spirit visage and he's complains about your champion in all chat, ahh that felt good all the numerous times that happened.

How you can bend q around wind wall and tilt a yasuos socks off.

How sleek the auto animation is.

How great it feels to clear the wave with w e q.

How one stun results in immediate death.

How if you hit q you can go ham and flash e w r and tilt the opponent into the rq.

How you're throwing your q's directly past the opponent but in your head you already worked out if they are the type of player that likes to try and dodge away from you or dodge towards you and you get into their head hitting them every time and notice when they change from a "dodge away" player to a "dodge towards" player and it's like you're mentally controlling them to eat more and more damage and then BOOM LASER BIATCH i fukd your mind so severely you forgot i had an ult.

Hitting q is like the most rewarding thing to hit in league of legends especially if you start hitting them in combo's, you throw twisted fates q and my brain doesn't even activate when i hit someone. Landing those juicy E's when someone uses zhonyas hourglass into near certain death every time, sniping people under their turrets with ludens, splitting q and hitting 2 people at the same time while getting ganked.

Throwing q's so that they split and reveal if enemies are in 2 bushes simultaneously, sieging the enemy from behind the wall, delving into all kinds of utterly stupid angles.

When playing against opponents that have really amazing movement and dodge all your skillshots and so you go into super dork mode and throw your abilities in 3 different directions and something lands so you laser them to the face and drop their confidence into the negative.

If a person cannot trust their own movement what can they trust, vel'koz is a psychological monster that makes an opponent turn on themselves.

How it feels to hit a minion from 5 miles away with q into the minion wave and then ludens proc, procs arcane comet AND THEN KILLS THE ADC.

When after all that i just mentioned the enemy team realise that you are by far the greatest threat on your team and resort to flashing onto you as a 5 but oh dear vel'koz has zhonyas hourglass and you see all the corpses line up around you.

No other champ in the game is as satisfying as vel'koz to master, infact i feel 100% braindead on any other champion. You're playing morgana and throw a binding BLAST if i was vel'koz i could have split that bitch in half. Playing twisted fate? with RESOLVE PRIMARY TREE LOL? what a weak champ man i swear. I could be frikking 0-5 kd and still delete the adc.

Vel is sooo satisfying. His entire kit lights up my brain.

That sound when you hit all 3 procs on passive and your opponent is like heeeelll nah i don't want anymore of this and hides under the turret which is exactly what you want.

The q bends, and spammability and how it interacts with the passive.

How easy it is to clear with W and how you can store them for extra insane damage.

How E is like the perfect wombo with team mates.

How laser feels in general and the damage hits the opponent immediately allowing you to snipe people at real low health at LIGHT SPEED.

All of this is a problem since i used to play so many champs but vel'koz is always the answer in every situation and it's not like i win every game, i play taliyah and know in my heart vel'koz would be so much better at this stage in the game, i utterly dismantle every twisted fate i play against in lane and remind myself why i don't play that trash champ. All of the counters like fizz, we both know fizz wins on paper but my laser says different and the tilted fizz might not play fizz again after that. LOL...

Literally dominate my lane in the vast majority of games, i think i got my ass kicked by this ekko player ONCE this year.

Vel'koz results in talking a lot of gibberish.