Source
r/TwoXChromosomes•
AnnaRKey

What is your definition of tramp, and related words?

The "is there a number that says you're a tramp" post got me thinking...

Is there, or do we, or do you have a definition of what a tramp, slut or whore is? I know it's a terrible topic, but I'd like people to answer honestly, and boldly. This is how we learn our views, and possibly change them.

Personally, when someone says "slut", "whore" or "tramp" I don't think about women who've had lots of sex, or actual sex workers, or strippers or porn stars. I think about a behaviour, or intent. I think it's more of a moral thing for me. Someone mentioned that maybe a lady who slept with your SO, might be considered one of these. But I think that to me, no one deserves to be called these names at all, but they have a definition to me, and I would only assign them to someone who really truly deserved them. I'm normally pretty accepting and optimistic with my views on things. But I do know how to draw a line between good and bad. The question is where is this line?

Personally I connect terrible words, with terrible people, who've done terrible things. Enjoying yourself, is not one of these things, so please don't think for a second that I am saying that having sex is a problem at all.

Either way, I'm just really curious as to what other ladies, and even men, think about the proper definition of such words, past and present, and where the line really is.

I've been trying for a long time to find the correct way to express this, and often have ended up insulting people while trying to sift through the thoughts on this topic.

Posted Mar 25, 2010, 12:49 AM UTC

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[deleted]•

I agree. When I think of slut, I think of A woman who has sex/is intimate for the wrong reasons/or doesn't care who she hurts in the process of intimacy. That includes cheating woman, women who lead men on, etc. A slut doesn't need to have sex to be a slut.

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AnnaRKeyOP•

I said this once, but in a much longer way (of course), and I was shamed for it. Not that I'm upset about it, or have any ill feelings towards that person. However, I want to know whether we should feel justified thinking this, and connecting these actions with words such as slut. Or whether we're not seeing the whole picture.

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big80smullet•

To me you're only a slut if you're hurting someone.

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[deleted]•

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AnnaRKeyOP•

Who are we to judge someone's intent, especially when we're not involved? I think this is a contribution to the root of confusion on the issue. Judgement happens, and personally, I feel judgement is fine, until it starts to effect how you might treat people, and how others might view them. I think making a judgement like this may be justified, however, I do not think anyone could justly shame someone who matches this description. I think the judgement can be justified in possibly recognising the position of this particular person and maybe shedding light on where this person may need help. But again, it's not really our business, but sometimes you cannot deny how you feel about something.

I think as women we can empathize with this image, and that may be why we recognise it, label it and stick our nose it to prevent bad things from continuing.

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[deleted]•

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CannaTao•

My definition of a tramp is a cute canine cartoon character. More seriously though, I think outdated stereotypes of people who have multiple partners are on their way out. They obviously aren't going to disappear overnight, but society as a whole places much less emphasis on "virginal purity" and the idea of a demure, inexperienced "gentle flower" bride isn't as attractive as it once was. The Victorian Era left some pretty deep, damaging roots in Western Society, but they're finally rotting away.

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AnnaRKeyOP•

Definitely. It seems as though all these terms are becoming detached from their meanings, and are becoming ordinary insults. "Bastard" use to be pretty hefty. Now, people barely flicker an eyelid. My hope is that words like tramp, slut and whore become silly insults like bitch or asshole, and no one will ever feel the burn of such words again.

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