It feels like I already died
I deactivated most of my social media a little over a week ago. I’m a guy that scrolls FB for several hours a day, and I just found it to be making matters worse so I deactivated it during a rather tense time with several people to try and escape.
Well, I’m bored, and I know nobody will notice if I reactivate it again for a minute and just check how everybody is doing. The way everybody has just gone on with their lives, new profile pictures here and there and hardly recognizing some people after just one week offline.
My best friends who never even noticed I had gone, and suddenly haven’t spoken to since, sharing regular posts every few hours.
My big girl got a haircut and seems to be getting on fine with her cousins.
My mom, sister, and other family just sharing their memes and jokes as normal.
My crush sharing events and things that are important to her but aren’t really my bag, further distancing me from getting the courage to talk to her.
It feels like I died, and missed all these things. The regular same old, and the new. That this is what it would really be like if I could just take that fucking step. But I can tell myself nobody cares at all, but I know you guys here do. Or so you say. I feel like the support we find here is all that keeps me going. And I guess that’s what’s important. But I drained myself so low by doing this.
Posted Oct 1, 2019, 1:06 AM UTC
I also deactivated my FB a few years ago and don't use instagram or other social media. I chose this decision and for me it was for the best. It sucks knowing noone misses me as noone ever tried to contact me so far but I also stopped being bitter about how others life are looking better since they are just living their lives.
If you really want to isolate yourself from social media just be aware is not easy.
Hope you all the best.
It did more harm than good to reactivate it, seeing everybody enjoying their every day lives, only without me. And it was only one damn week. Needless to say, once I saw everything I hopped back off and I think I’m going to stay offline a little longer, perhaps a few months. Instagram is nice because I follow people who have similar goals as I do, so it gives me motivation rather than insecurity or disdain for myself like the more diverse mix on Facebook does. Thank you for your response, it’s encouraging to me.