I’m just so effing lonely, y’know?
Ugh. So I’m mostly just feeling sorry for myself right now and posting because I’m physically unable to cry.
Since I had my daughter, all my old child free friends dumped me (to be expected, really). I’ve always been a bit of a loner, but over the past few years, my handful of remaining friends have moved states. Other than work, my husband, my five year old, the only socializing I get is seeing my riding instructor once a week.
I became pretty friendly with another mom at daycare, who happens to live down the street. Our girls are buddies and our spouses get along. I introduced her to a coworker of mine, who has a baby the same age as her youngest. You see where this is going, right?
They were just posting FB statuses at a local tequila bar. With the “mom squad” they have apparently created. They apparently also had lunch on Friday (co worker was supposed to go shopping for another employee’s shower gift with me, but told me she had to go home because her baby was sick).
My family is gone ( parents dead, my brother on another coast and too busy to do more than call once a month). My in-laws are okay, but there is a ton of drama there (hubby is a bit of the black sheep and his sisters are very dramatic).
I’m just so fucking lonely. I grew up in a pretty rural area, my parents always at work, so I learned to enjoy my own company - reading, crafting, walking my dog. I don’t have time for any of that stuff now, between work and keeping my family alive. Even if I did, you can only crochet so much. Is it so wrong to want to connect with humans once in a while? Like humans I’m not in a transactional relationship with? Who just want to talk and have fun with me? My only friends right now are Ben & Jerry.
Posted Mar 8, 2020, 6:18 AM UTC
I feel you about having friends that then seem to do their own thing with other friends and not include you. It's a shit feeling and especially if you've put in effort and everything seemed ok.
Fuck em and it sucks but I'm sure one day you'll click with someone and they won't be horrible and do those things. It sucks in the meantime though. Are there any classes you could do with kiddo to meet other mums?
Thanks.
This is so whiny and petty, but I’m seriously heartbroken right now. I feel like I’m in middle school again.
It’s not whiny or petty. It’s human. Humans arent meant to be alone - were social creatures (some more so than others). Have you tried going onto Meetup to maybe find a local crafting/crocheting group? I used to join mom groups and realized those were the worst to try and make friends. Now I try to join meetup groups based on similar interests rather than shared circumstances. I’ve made quality friends that are childless and don’t seem to mind one bit coordinating around my schedule with my son.