You belong here

Let the pain

reign.

Won't be free

or gain

anything.

Such a thing

is a lie.

​

Die.

I want to die.

No one's on

my side.

My life

is all lies.

Disguise.

​

Remember.

You cannot deny

that you have come from a better time.

It might

seem like a dream

that you used to soar

to fly.

​

Float.

Let it go.

No one's on

your side.

There's no point.

Don't try.

Don't cry.

You're going to

​

NO

​

hope.

Stay afloat.

For a little bit longer.

Despair.

I don't care

at all.

I'm gonna fall.

Hold on.

Hold on.

Just a little bit longer.

Hold on.

Because you belong here.

​

And there will come a time

where you will finally know

that you will finally heal

that you will finally grow.

Don't go, i'll have you know

that I am gonna be here.

Stay with me, don't disappear

for a little bit longer.

​

Oh, how I long for

Happiness.

​

And if the weight is just too heavy

please just tell me when you're hurting.

It's okay to be in pain

I don't wanna be a burden

please just tell me if you're hurting.

Please just stay.

It will be okay.

​

Because life

isn't like a story.

You must never end it to early.

And the pain will go away.

Just stay.

For a little bit longer

because you belong here.

​

And there will come a time

where you will finally know

that you will finally heal

that you will finally grow.

​

I don't know how long your pain will last

but it'll pass.

Please don't give up

the sky will clear.

Because you belong here.

​

And when I looked into your eyes

I was surprised, I never knew.

But if the past just doesn't matter

you'll know I'm telling the truth.

When I looked into your eyes

and when I put off my disguise

I just knew.

​

I knew I was in heaven with you.

​

We'll see this through.

​

Your scars will disappear,

no more tears and no more fear

because you belong here.

​

You belong here.

​

​

​

Sorry for this insanely long poem. I just wrote it off the top of my head without thinking too much about it. This is my first time posting here, and any form of constructive criticism is highly appreciated.

​

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/iixjqh/am_i_in_love/g39w3gm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/ij1kzl/name_on_sand/g3bwvmv?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

Posted Aug 30, 2020, 7:11 AM UTC

1711
hotlinehelpbot•

If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out. You can find help at a National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

USA: 18002738255 US Crisis textline: 741741 text HOME

United Kingdom: 116 123

Trans Lifeline (877-565-8860)

Others: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org

2
aZXr9Ntq6A•

Amir Khoda Ridderstrap

1
opheliaonthelake•

I have nothing critical to say about this piece I love it. So full of energy &hope. This energy going forward 🤞🏼✌🏼💕❤️✨

2
Void_Null_None•

Hey I don't usually comment on peotry but I really liked your use of repetition, I think it adds some depth and works well with the theme.

2
Nice_OCpost•

I think there’s brilliance in this piece being a poetry. I think it’s genius to force the listener to look up some words, thus forcing the reader to read it several times; you couldn’t do that with a long piece. Lastly, you end with humility, which is another only-way to pull this off.

It’s short, it’s high-brow without being high-brow, and it’s fun in its poetry goodness. It’s brilliant.

2
noisyfrog021003•

This piece is a combination of sweet words and hurtful emotions. I appreciate your repititions- they add more punches to your reader. Your style and set-up is also simply amazing. I have no reason to be critical here. Keep writing, pal!

1
Think-Deeply-01•

somehow it is staccato but flows very smoothly at the same time. Great work!

1
harpteethtooter•

Absolutely beautiful! Thank you so much for sharing! I'm no scholar to critique your work. All I know is, it moved me. Significantly. Beautiful.

1
[deleted]•

[removed]

1
haywhat•

This is awesomeeee. I started it kind of worrying it was going in a different direction, but I ended up locked in, and genuinely moved by the way the poem shifts in narrative. The repetition is really powerful, and although it seems long on paper once I started reading it it seemed to almost fly by. Loved it! In regards to this being your first post here, I think it's safe to say... 'You belong here'. Looking forward to more!

1
Batoiii•

Second half of the poem abandons the sparsely wordedness that makes the first part captivating The more wordy portions could have been used as resting points in the poems structure

1