[1671] Untitled

Scifi story i think? not really sure what genre.

First time writing a story, and I'm mostly doing it for myself. I'm a teacher and thought it'd help my understanding of English, which it has. Also its been fun.

Atm I'm going for a Scifi/magic? mix. I plan on keeping the tone somewhat dark, but with some humor mixed in. I guess I'm looking for critiques in my writing that I probably haven't even noticed yet. As well as if you feel like you'd want more of the story.

[1671] https://docs.google.com/document/d/1R-OhzxbSRuFD8ALn4aSDGZGqwvr6_VOKrSYLNo5661E/edit?usp=sharing

Critiques

[727]

https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/jvi01n/727_defenders_of_laetor/gcpqqxg?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

[908]

https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/jvxcnt/908_the_video_meeting/gcpu0dx?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

[547]

https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/jwejpv/547_tomorrow/gcq4ogo?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3