Source
r/seduction•
ge99

Need help with AA, kino, leading and being assertive and being confident about yourself? I have found a secret weapon.

And that weapon is swing dance lessons. :D

About a month ago I checked out some cheap swing dancing lessons in my area and have experienced a lot change in me with regards to AA, confidence, kino, leading and being assertive.

Confidence

You are going to suck when you start and quickly learn to be confident and comfortable failing, stepping and bumping all over people and moving your body. After a while you just don't care and feel comfortable in your own skin.

Partners have noticed that I no longer have a look of panic in my eyes trying something new or challenging. I just try and fail without losing my frame.

Kino

You're going to be touching a women the entire time and spend a lot of time staring into each others eyes inches away from her face. You are constantly in the "pre-kiss" position. ;) Back and hand contact is mandatory.

My kino was poor before because I felt uncomfortable touching women. After the 30th dance partner touching women is just a natural piece of my behavior now.

Leading and being Assertive

Swing, like all couple dances, revolves around the men leading their partner around. You make subtle body cues, literally pushing and pulling to get your partner to go where you want. You are the leader, literally, nothing happens without you indicating it happens.

AA

During the practice and "free dance" sessions you must go up to a women, introduce yourself and ask to dance. There is no other option besides standing around looking like a fool. And you know what? These ratio of women to men makes it so they are literally begging you to come over and dance with them.

Bonuses

  • The ratio of these classes and groups is about 2/1 women to men and half the guys are gay.

  • Women LOVE when I talk about swing dancing and show them pictures and videos of myself. Its like farting diamonds. A weak hook or set becomes strong instantaneously. Day 2s become easy because you have something awesome to take them too. Half my # closes are done in the middle of an interaction now about taking them to a lesson.

  • My posture and body language has become better, taller and more upright. Strengthened lots of little core helper muscles I think. I feel more "framed"

  • Dancers have great bodies.

Give it a try, swing dancing is a major hobby of mine now and I'm having tons of fun doing it.

Edit - Added some more color.

Posted Sep 15, 2011, 5:11 PM UTC · edited

13470
Itsatrapski•

Upvotes for farting diamonds. And all the other stuff too I guess... :)

57
motherducker•

Nah, really just for farting diamonds.

27
wdnlng•

I had my first lesson last Monday. It was great and OP is right on the money.

29
cpcallen•

So, I've been dancing for... oh, about fifteen years, and I can confirm that basically everything that OP says is true. Certainly, of all the things I learned when I was in university, dance was the one which has had the biggest impact on my life in general, and my confidence around (and success with) women in particular.

I want to point out a few things, though, for people who may not be too familiar with social dance scenes:

  • The swing dance scene is not generally a pick-up scene. That is to say: though people do (frequently) end up meeting people they go on to date, most people are there primarily to dance, rather than to hook up. (I have been told that this is much less true of latin dance scenes, though I have no first-hand experience.)

    • People who want to keep the scene comfortable and welcoming to new dancers will not appreciate you hitting on people overtly, and in most contexts kissing / grinding etc. on the dance floor is not really appropriate. Of course, you should be adept enough to find some place more private for such things anyway...

  • If you really get bitten by the dancing bug you will probably find that you don't really want to take non-dancers on a date to a social dance evening because you will want to dance with your many dancing friends and your date will not appreciate feeling neglected.

  • Because so much physical contact is a normal and expected part of dancing, it can be quite difficult to figure out who might be interested in you and who is merely friendly and enjoys dancing with you.

  • In many places, the local dance scene is quite small and even the international community of swing dancers is not really that large. Some people adopt a "I don't date people I work with" attitude, and many will notice if you're constantly hitting on / hooking up with other dancers (a friend of mine who is very successful with women has been described by other friends as a "man-slut"). I don't think there's necessarily anything wrong with having such a reputation - indeed, it clearly works for him - but do be aware that people will know you and judge you by your reputation.

    • I also know of a few guys who have a reputation of making women feel very uncomfortable on the dance floor, usually because of inappropriate/creepy comments or contact. Don't be that guy.

  • In part because of this, dancers I know are quite discrete about their relationships. Many people you meet will already have a boyfriend/girlfriend, but (unlike in many other social contexts) it probably won't be obvious. I've often know both halves of a couple for several months before realising that they were together - and, in one case, married!

  • Be aware that the confidence and the comfort approaching, leading, and initiating physical contact that you will gain from learning to dance will not necessarily carry over fully once you leave the dance hall. To be sure: I am in general much more confident and comfortable with women than I used to be, but I still regularly kick myself for not approaching women in day-to-day contexts that I would not have hesitated for an instant to approach at a dance.

So, would I recommend learning to dance? Yes, absolutely. It's done wonders for me and many people I know. Virtually everyone I've dated in the last four years has been someone I met through dancing. Additionally, I've met many wonderful friends and travelled all over Europe because of it. It has brought me untold happiness. But...

TL;DR: Be aware that it's not a magic solution to all your problems with women.

12
ge99OP•

I should edit the post. I recommend befriending all participants not sleeping with them.

3
MakinBacon•

Thank you for the insight. It's these types of things (gotchas, beginner mistakes, insider, advice, etc...) that are especially useful.

1
[deleted]•

I agree with almost all of these points. You have to approach, you have to touch, make eye contact, make conversation etc.

I found that most women did not enjoy dancing with me because I'm a really shitty dancer, but it was a great exercise nonetheless. I am not very coordinated but maybe with some practice I'll get the hang of it?

11
ge99OP•

Hell yeah you will.

6 months ago I couldn't dance to save my life. Practicing in front of a mirror everyday worked wonders and feel comfortable at a club or wedding.

Dancing is 90% muscle memory and body awareness. Some of the most awesome looking moves don't require much dexterity at all.

7
winbot5000•

I have 8 dexterity :( I'll be a negative the whole time!

5
[deleted]•

dexterity? I hope not.

2
ge99OP•

Crap, can't edit the title? Oopsie about the double ands.

6
SanguineHaze•

Didn't even notice man lol, I think you're safe.

10
sparklyteenvampire•

I can vouch for this, but may I suggest salsa or tango lessons instead? Girls fucking lose their minds when you bust out some salsa moves.

6
ge99OP•

No easily accessible salsa lessons around me. Been searching, mostly classes that require a partner.

1
tejmin•

So find one!

3
redditorfor16days•

try posting on okcupid, or craigslist in some of the platonic, community, or non-sexual m4w sections. seems like a killer personals ad.

1
Thaddaeus•

I love swing dancing and OP is correct it makes day 2's super easy! What girl wouldn't want to come swing dancing?

5
vgry•

The only time I took a girl to salsa lessons on a Day 2 she spent the whole time staring at her feet - it was a horrible date. Maybe free dance is better than a lesson?

4
[deleted]•

maybe you had bad breath

7
okaynipuna•

I've been swing dancing for 5 years now. Sadly, I'm on an engineering campus so the guy/girl ratio is almost flipped. Still, the sexiest encounters I've had with strangers is swing dancing. That holds double if you get into Blues dancing from there.

4
[deleted]•

What's the age range? Are you in a group specifically for people around your age (or a college club) or are you at general swing dancing lessons that just happen to have a lot of younger girls?

3
ge99OP•

Age range is all over.

I don't go to game. ( crap, phone auto correct changed that I to I'm )

Too many social connectors and pivots that can provide massive amounts of DHV. "Oh hey ge99, lets show my hot friends our moves!" :D:D:D:D

3
[deleted]•

I'm don't go to game.

That sentence confused me.

5
SanguineHaze•

It's not about having game while there. The actions are to strengthen game in other contexts. I fail to see what confuses you about this. Even pro athletes aren't in game mode 100% of the time. Though, I'm sure if the opportunity arises...

4
Spanglish_Inhibition•

Er... I think he may have been talking about the grammar.

6
dumblederp•

I agree with everything except that SALSA dancing is much more about sex.

3
acconrad•

Any reason you prefer swing over other lessons?

2
ge99OP•

I do genuinely enjoy the music so that helps. Did salsa once too and liked that too.

Mostly do swing because of availability/convenience but swing has a certain "bounce" to it that I enjoy.

Fairly sure these concept apply to all couple dances. Men as leaders, tons of kino, lots of women, etc...

5
[deleted]•

How good are you at dancing? I'm terrible, and I think that even with lessons I'd still be terrible.

3
crasch4•

I was terrible too, and I'm still not great, but I'm good enough now that I enjoy social dancing and no longer feel like I'm tormenting my dance partners.

Here were the keys for me:

  1. Accept that it's a long term project. I've been at it for about 6 months, and only now am feeling somewhat comfortable dancing.
  2. Dance frequently, as in at least 2-3 times/week. Less frequently, and you will forget what you learn from one lesson to the next, and you will feel as if you're making no progress.
  3. Take private lessons! They're extremely helpful, as you get the instructors undivided attention. You also only have to worry about your own competence, and not your partner's ability (or lack thereof). The lessons also go at your own pace, and you can ask questions whenever you want--no getting lost at the beginning of the class, and feeling like a fool because you failed to learn a foundational step.
  4. Get the basics down before moving onto fancy stuff.
  5. Try different styles of dance. I started out in lindy hop, which was frustrating, as it has a fairly steep learning curve. I switched to blues dancing, which is more forgiving, and I've enjoyed it much more. I plan to take lindy hop again, cause I love the music and the way it looks, but I'm concentrating on blues right now.
6
Thaddaeus•

I'm white and don't have the hips for latin dances. That's why swing is awesome for me.

0
EntLowkick•

that's an old, tired excuse even in joke form. Anyone can at least salsa... it will force you to feel the beat and start moving those frigid hips.

Also, and most importantly, latin chicks LOVE white dudes.

8
Thaddaeus•

Ok. Maybe my reply was too short.

I can salsa dance and keep a girl entertained with enough moves for a song. It just doesn't look good with me doing it because I haven't practiced moving the hips the way you are supposed to. So I just do the moves without it normally.

I just haven't invested as much time in latin dances as I have smooth ones.

3
EntLowkick•

It's all good, the fact that you can make it through a song means you are proficient enough to keep learning. You already have most of the guys beat, because when some salsa track comes on and all the really hot latin chicks hit the dance floor, most dudes are saying to themselves what you said way up there...

3
PasDeDeux•

Cuban motion, proper ballroom salsa/chacha hip technique, takes years to develop. Even "Street salsa" movement takes a while.

2
rubygeek•

I'm white and don't have the hips for latin dances

WTF. Strength? Flexibility? Looks? Any of those three you get if you actually exercise your hips, and dances that depends on strong hip movement will make a difference. If your hip isn't up to latin dance, then you'd really benefit in overall health from fixing it - you'd reduce your chance of lower back pain while you're at it.

1
Chrono803•

Awesome! Now I just need to get out there and actually go to the first class :p

2
PhysicalEd•

Not only swing dancing though, any form of ballroom.

There's a club at my university that's doing free lessons and we've covered Cha Cha, Jive, Waltz, Quickstep, Tango, etc.

If you can find anything like that around you, go!

2
seddit_throwaway1500•

Dance classes are great for improving yourself, having fun and meeting new people. I started with salsa dancing and have done that more than swing dancing, but their respective communities are totally different. I must say that swing dancing feels far more welcoming and open at times.

2
phazei•

Heh, well, I've been swing dancing for about 7months now. Started taking a lot of classes, east coast, lindy hop, charleston (20's & 40's), balboa, shag, blues, even some west coast, and am learning some cool tricks. I'm not great, but I'm pretty good.

Now as far as women go, I can only say the ratio is just as shit as the rest of Vegas, and nearly all the women are taken. Since it's social dancing, they'll dance with you regardless and it's really fun. The scene here is just too small, only one place once a week mostly the same people, and one other monthly event. I did visit another city with a much bigger scene, and it would be fine there.

I just wish there were something redeeming in Vegas... :/

Single 2 years and counting, sigh.

2
cody_au•

Yeah, because instead of addressing problems face on, it's better to do time consuming, roundabout things that don't address your problems but may (but more likely won't) address your problems. Or hey, just say, "This is awesome, I'm totally going to do this!" and then not actually do it because you can't find/afford/bother going to dance lessons, AND not do anything to directly address your problems either. Success!

We went through all of this stuff in 2003. I feel like I'm reading the online equivalent of non stop get-rich-quick or get-thin-fast dieting schemes here. Avoidance is not the way to get healthy.

2
Sed5•

He's completely right.

We went through all of this stuff in 2003.

What sort of stuff? How does this not solve the problem.

And thanks for your input!

1
cody_au•

He's completely right about what? He has described how he feels dancing changed him, and proposes it as a solution to a laundry list of problems.

Is dancing responsible for his "success" (more on that later)? Before you answer (even to agree with me), don't just assume it. Take a look through his post and the rest of his history. He uses a lot of community terms and has obviously spent some time studying and trying to apply it. Would you agree, if anything, there's a combination of the two at work.

Now he hasn't defined if he is successful. He's said that he's a good dancer now, and made a bunch of logical connections that may or may not be biased, and may or may not apply to others. He hasn't said if he didn't get laid before, if he gets laid now, if he gets laid more now, etc.

Actually, in one of his other posts he comments that he doesn't even cold approach, he does social circle game with his dancing friends.

What he has done is proposed that you cut 100% of the population you have in your life (work, friends, clubs, the supermarket, the street) and learn dancing, so that if you become good, you might learn some skills, which combined with other pickup information, might get you laid within a tiny circle of which he is the leader.

Do you see how stupid that is?

What did we try in 2003? Everything. Look, you guys are working off of information collected by all of us over the past decade (that is, from ~1999 onwards) about this stuff, where we systematically tried everything.

Now pre-2003 was about NLP, hypnosis and other magic mental tricks to try to convince yourself that you could just do what you're avoiding to do. 2003 was where we started thinking, "Wow, maybe lifestyle has something to do with it!" Everything was up for grabs, DANCING of all kinds was one of them, going to the gym was another, all becoming amateur stand-up comedians was another.

This stuff is all fun for hobbies, no doubt, and I wouldn't encourage anyone not to do them. However, if you're doing it to avoid confronting a debilitating personal issue like being UNABLE TO TALK TO WOMEN then you're going about it completely the wrong way.

All of these things are flawed, aside from the pure insanity of not addressing your choice/fear not to do something by doing something else different but kind of related.

And that flaw is as I mentioned above, limiting yourself. Anyone who has spent time in the musical or stand-up scene will tell you, the skills you have in front of an audience don't transfer from one to the other. A very experienced music guy goes up and tries stand-up and is scared shitless; and vice-versa. It happens all the time.

A proficient club pickup guy goes into the street during the day time? AA ensues and he'll usually chicken out. Day guy in a night club? Same thing. And these are about as close as you can possibly get.

Extrapolate that from DANCING, to meeting a girl cold in the street. Or a girl at your work. Or a girl through a friend. You are not going to be fucking dancing with her. All of your work, training, building up your mental resistance to all of your personal issues is going to come back right to the forefront and you'll be FUCKED.

And you know what? While there might be a romantic ideal between dancing and sex, the truth is that almost everyone on the planet can't dance for shit and is still getting laid. So don't even let that stupid thought breed its little tentacles through your brain and form an association that this is any kind of cure. It isn't.

If you want proven cures:

AA problems? Talk to people. Kino problems? Touch people. Leading problems? Take charge of the interactions. Being assertive problems? Speak your mind.

Seriously, seriously, 100% seriously, how can you possibly hope to address these problems by doing something else? If you distract yourself with dancing for 6 months just to get yourself to get over your AA (and if it even works, seeing as it has been proven since thousands of posts since 2003 and as explained through evolutionary biology, that skills don't transfer well because people feel uncomfortable outside of their exact comfort zone, respectively), wouldn't that time better be spent - going to the crux of the fucking issue and TALKING TO THE GIRL.

Do I need to lay this out anymore? Do you see the connection between fat people wanting any explanation to how to lose weight OTHER than eating right and exercising? Banana smoothie diet! Sounds logical to me! Eat only soup diet! Sounds reasonable, it must be right! Or any other stupid scheme to make money, "without working, work from home, just like a mom at her computer did."

With all due respect as a polite guy and someone just here chatting with me, stop helping delude others by playing into their fantasies that they can avoid doing the work to get the results they want.

2
Sed5•

He's completely right about what? He has described how he feels dancing changed him, and proposes it as a solution to a laundry list of problems.

I was talking about you...that's why I replied to you. I was saying you are right. That's why I upvoted you! You misunderstood.

You are not going to be fucking dancing with her. All of your work, training, building up your mental resistance to all of your personal issues is going to come back right to the forefront and you'll be FUCKED.

yep I agree!

What did we try in 2003? Everything. Look, you guys are working off of information collected by all of us over the past decade (that is, from ~1999 onwards) about this stuff, where we systematically tried everything.

how do we not repeat our mistakes?

AA problems? Talk to people. Kino problems? Touch people. Leading problems? Take charge of the interactions. Being assertive problems? Speak your mind.

What about AA but only when cold approaching?

I like your no none sense no bs sort of solutions. It's just logical and doesn't try to go around the problem. Just face it head on.

1
cody_au•

Cool thanks. Yeah when I read your post I was like, wait who's he agreeing with. (What's funny is that I'm about to suggest a bunch of stupid shit that works quickly and does face the problem head on, but just as easily could be dismissed as "trying to go around the problem". Irony!)

For AA only when cold approaching, there's so many tested and proven solutions to that, so it's a great question! I used to be Mr AA in the day :-D We used to laugh on our way out, "So which corner are we going to stand in?" and literally end up standing in it twiddling our thumbs! Oh man, the sadness. Haha. Because as much as people would say, "Go socialise! Go chat to the bouncer/bartender! Go talk to some girl on the way out! 3 second rule!", we'd never do it. We were social retards and/or introverts. To this day I still don't do that shit. If I didn't have my girlfriend today... I'd be able to go talk to any girl I liked without this warm up / work around shit.

However... there are a few workarounds I used to use.

The straightforward thing is that if you force yourself to go out every night (and on weekends, we'd do laps walking around the city for literally four/five hours, because it would be packed with people from lunch time onwards and even around 4pm there'd be straggler lone-wolves to talk to)... you will eventually break through AA. How do I know?

Standing in the corner for a month, you begin to get really bored, and will do anything to alleviate it. As long as you don't allow that 'anything' to be not going out anymore, or talking to the bartender/bouncer and other guys, the only alternative is to open sets in the club. Even someone with extreme AA (such as myself) will usually do really well with that first set, or bomb it so hard they're willing to do another because unintentional self-torture is hilariously funny after a while.

And when doing laps around the city, your legs/feet get so sore that you have no choice but to sit down somewhere, and seeing as you're out to talk to people and there's usually chicks are on the benches and it has been something on your mind for the past hour or so ...

It sounds stupid (because it is) but it works, and it's pretty immediate, I mean at most you're going to waste a few hours/days. Both techniques help you sit down within the first 30 seconds or so, too, which is a really good tactic in either day or night venues.

It sounds kind of stupid, straightforward, and punishing, but I guess I'm a big believer that mental barriers can be broken down straightforwardly, and your human will will eventually break through whatever barrier you put in front of it given enough time, effort, and incentive. I mean, your brain isn't stupid.

But you know, I'm talking kind of generally about what we did. I also have a laundry list of books I'd recommend, but two in particular for AA. One is Awaken the Giant Within (because it goes a lot into psychology, but nothing else by the same author, his stuff becomes kind of cultish and some of it flat wrong), and Radical Honesty (or its sister book, Radical Honesty in Dating).

Now, why.

Robbins's point is that like a lot of other animals, the human mind decides what to do based on perceived pain and pleasure. Think of study... you put it off for as long as possible because the pleasure of doing something other than studying is way more than the immediate perceived punishment of not doing it (e.g. nothing).

But as the exam comes close, or even the next day, the immediate perceived searing pain of not studying is FAILURE vs the mild pleasure of doing nothing... so you study. I think that's why the standing around doing nothing and letting boredom take care of the rest, is a powerful motivator.

It's that kind of stuff which helped me get a grip on why stuff happens, though not necessarily helped me changing myself... as Robbins says, change happens in an instant from your decision to change. But it probably helped me stack the chips...

Radical Honesty (and other) is a different thing. It goes in-depth meandering and crazy, but it has one sole point. It's possible, and freeing, to go through life and tell the truth about absolutely everything. He gives a lot of examples of him and others doing it, and talking about how stress is caused by lying to yourself and/or others and/or not doing what you want. The sister book puts the same stuff into context of dating, and had some good tips - though of course not especially geared for the seduction community, I got a lot from it. It was a much easier and more applicable read than the original, but it also didn't hit as hard for why telling the truth about things can be a life-changer. As the two are hard for me to separate my various successes for, I have to say both are good.

Where that book helped me is by giving me an option. Something not really recommended in the community is - telling the truth. Don't tell the girl you're single! Don't tell the girl you're in the bar alone! Don't tell her you're there to pick up... the whole "hide your intent" thing was something that came from 2003 as well (aka "indirect game") and was repeatedly bashed at by the following direct movement.

However there are remnants of them both today, and they both had valid points, and both worked. Indirect was likely to fall down for many people because it was obvious they were hiding something and weren't very comfortable with it... direct fell down for people who came on too strong and weren't able to back it up because it wasn't consistent with the rest of their personality.

The other road, a kind of middle path if you will, is to tell the truth (though again there's a style to it). Where this really comes to help with AA is, you can literally walk up to someone and say, "I felt weird about coming to talk to you, but I wanted to because you're pretty." I used this A LOT when my brain went blank and I had nothing else. Looking back, I also did this a few times as a complete beginner without realising it, and those sets went really well.

You can just as well use, "Hey", or any of the other million opening lines and random throw-away shit, and we did that too. But there's something VERY freeing about actually putting what's in your brain and that you're confused/angry about, right out there. And I never had a bad reaction from it.

I mean, how badly could anyone possibly react to the truth? "Well, you probably shouldn't have, because I have a boyfriend" (nobody ever said this, but I guess it was possible). What's my end feeling about that? Nothing, it was a perfectly logical 100% open communication. Hell, you could then continue on in the same style, and it would be great.

Of course we did more daring stuff. "I love your eyelashes" was one huge one, which turned into a whole opener... "Someone just came up to me and said I had awesome eyelashes... that was weird... you should know... do I need to trim these down or something?" The girl looks into your eyes, you're looking directly back, BAM... it's game on!

"Your hair looks so soft, can I touch it?" I remember one set with that which went awesome, for like an hour in the middle of the street and the girl was INTRIGUED! I didn't close though, it was before we "knew" to get a number and how to follow but. But this is shit I used to think about when I was walking around the city for hours on end. It almost sounds creepy in text. But if you really thought something (other than, "I really want to stick my dick in her!") and say it, it's almost always congruent (because it's the real you), so it's not creepy, and people will just accept it. "I want to sit down." I mean, it doesn't get any easier than this. "You smell nice." It doesn't have to be a compliment, actually we tried to avoid that by turning things into statements (though there's nothing wrong with it, but at the time it was all about being strong, etc etc and other garbage). Not, "I love your hair", but "I want to touch your hair." Actually, Juggler later turned this into his own complete method, and one of his books is really worth reading (though I found it really lacking a thread to follow in regards to how to run the whole pickup, so it's not really a solution in itself IMHO even if the guy is a genius).

I pretty much grew up telling the truth, and it's something that I lost a bit as I got older, but once I rediscovered it, found it's a really powerful way to stay congruent and attract people.

With all of that said, there's still the rest of your game plan, and shit that you won't be productive for you to say whether you think it or not... but that's another story. For getting off your ass... it's a good thing to try, and free. And not that I want you to spend money on stupid books over field work, if you were really interested, you can find them in the library or online and learn a little bit about how you work as a person inside.

2
redditorfor16days•

i would recommend ANY dance classes, because it puts you in contact with women in a manufactured environment where your value is really high due to the male/female ratio. also, if you're a younger guy, you may be around somewhat older women, who will likely treat you very well, which helps with how you perceive your relationship to women.

even outside the realm of seduction, i recommend it to young guys who feel bad about themselves or lack confidence.

2
quintin3265•

I disagree with this post.

Where are you dancing that the ratio is 2:1 follows to leads? I've never been to a swing dance lesson where there were more follows than leads.

I used to swing dance for three years, and got pretty good at it. But I quit because the ratio become so bad that that "pickup" atmosphere that I hate came up - like you would see in a bar. I spent half of the time standing around because all the follows were already "taken." Whenever a girl was available, someone else would usually ask her to dance before I could even start walking towards her. Generally, we would start a four-month series of lessons with even genders, but after two weeks the ratio would approach 1:2 or 1:3.

As to getting over anxiety, even after years I was never able to get over anxiety. I still got very anxious when dancing even at the end. I think the issue with swing dancing is that men have to spend a lot of mental effort thinking about the next move, whereas women can follow almost anything as long as they have the right amount of tension (most women didn't). The woman doesn't stop dancing and say "Let's do this move instead." It is extremely draining to always have to be the leader.

I might try it again if the ratio of follows to leads was at most 1:1.5, which is why I'm curious to find out where you dance with such an opposite ratio balance.

2
[deleted]•

[deleted]

1
WolfInTheField•

Fuck. I already got told I needed dance classes. I'm afraid this is on the list now.

1