Summer Romance (Haiku)
Posted Jan 18, 2021, 3:41 PM UTC · edited
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I’ve spent warm humid nights on islands in Thailand falling in love for just a few days. Thank you for this.
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Sounds amazing to be honest. I’m glad this piece connected with you :)
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Simple but beautiful. Short like a summer romance :)
The nature of the summer romance is also nicely expressed by the other metaphors: "in the sun", "until the leaves fell"... Which give the impression that a romance is a natural phenomenon, like the weather, like seasons, and has its natural development and end...
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That’s definitely what I was trying to conjure up, so I’m glad you saw it this way. Thank you for your thoughtful feedback and kind words :)
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Lots of admiration for short form and fixed verse. I like that this love occurs in daylight, under a sun instead of under the moon. I also like the passage of time referenced by seasons.
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Thank you so much for your feedback :)
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Oh man, this so perfectly captures everything about a summer romance. Nothing extra wasted; short and bittersweet and matter-of-fact. The imagery is great too — we think we’re the center of the world, loving under the sun. But even we can’t deny the falling leaves of seasonal (and emotional) change.
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Precisely! You hit the nail on the head and I appreciate your thoughtful feedback. So glad you like the piece :)
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I'm one of those that's skeptical of the 5-7-5 standard for English haikus, since it's such a different language. But it does seem to work perfectly here. You do a good job of integrating nature, weaving it into the emotional undertone of the poem, as well.
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Thank you. I definitely struggle sometimes under a 5-7-5 constraint, it seems a little clunky when used in English. I’m glad that this one worked for you! Appreciate the kind words and feedback :)
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I’m glad you could relate to this! Hope you’re doing ok, and thank you for the kind words :)
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Thank you!
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Thank you for the kind words :)
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Me too! Thank you v much :)
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A lovely haiku. I have only written a couple in my time. This was a lovely piece with a lovely message
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Keep writing them! Thank you for your kind words :)
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What a beautiful haiku. It reminds me of a passionate fling that quickly faded. I admire the parallels between seasons and romance. Although, it's been done before I will never get bored of it.
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It’s a tried cliche that I can’t shake off! Glad you enjoyed the piece :)
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To be honest, I don’t think I’ll ever get bored of it...at least, not yet. I’ve seen it used in very interesting ways. This way was for sure one of them!
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This haiku gives me hope for what the future has to offer. I can't wait to experience this feeling again. Thank you, friend, great job!
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Thank you so much for reading. Glad you enjoyed :)
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This is what I love about haikus, you don’t have to make 4 stanzas to make a point. You keep it short and meaningful. Great job, I see a bright future in your writes
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Thank you. Appreciate you!
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Don’t really know too much about Haikus but I do enjoy the imagery
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Happy you like it!
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Wow!! That’s some high praise, I’m honoured. Glad you like it :)
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This is great. I don’t mess with haikus much, so This is doubly a delight to read. Really captures the feeling of fleeting romance that accompanies a summer fling. If I’m reading between the lines, I picture the writer looking back wistfully from fall or winter.
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Well thank you v much I appreciate the thoughtful feedback, and I’m glad you enjoyed :)
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I can relate, and find this haiku very interesting. Especially in how the last line was so different.
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This is perfect, sweet, and manages to convey such a universal feeling in three lines. I think anyone reading this was able to picture someone very specific and near/dear to their heart. I certainly did. Great job!
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I thought when I clicked on this I would see the rest of the poem. I now have read it five or six times, maybe more, and I am going to read it again a few more times. I never thought about sweet nothings in a very long time, or even this might be the first time.. I remember them though... I was so young...this poem brings me to tears, and I thank you for that.
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While inexperienced with Haikus I will say I love this one. It embodies one idea, presents it without confusion and keeps to the rules (I think.)
I get the emotion of nostalgia, of remembering/memories. The rose-tinged look on childhood should I say, not useful but also not damaging. Remembered Innocence I think.
Forgive my rambling.
Not rambling at all! Thank you for the thoughtful feedback and the kind words :)