Source
r/puppy101•
Fitzarr

Really Struggling

Puppy Blues

Hi all,

We picked up our 13 week greyhound puppy (Azula) on the 6th, and I'm honestly really struggling with the puppy blues. Sleep deprivation, constantly having to take her out in foul weather, accidents inside are all just making me so tired and frustrated. She's perfectly sweet natured and is actually being very well behaved for a puppy, but the idea of her not being here just fills me with a huge sense of relief.

I didn't expect to feel like this - my wife and I have both owned dogs and puppies before and don't remember it being anywhere near this hard. And, as I said, she's actually being very good - is learning her name and is doing well on the lead, and isn't really being destructive or badly behaved at all.

I just don't know how I'm going to balance raising and training her with work and hobbies and actually having an enjoyable time outside of being with puppy. It feels like my comfortable life I had before has been taken away, when the hope and idea was that she would add to our family and bring even more love and happiness into it. And I feel very guilty for typing that out.

My parents are also in hospital with COVID, so there's probably some emotional blurring going on. But I'm finding things very hard.

Posted Feb 8, 2021, 9:28 AM UTC

29
SteamyBunz•

I’m glad someone else said it. I feel the exact same way, I got my little rescue boy on Friday, he’s 18 weeks. Very sweet boy but very clingy. I understand he will take time to relax and come out his shell, he’s a Romanian rescue and had a terrible start to life. Now he’s in a new home, new country (Scotland) , with new people one again. He’s making small bits of progress each day which is very rewarding, but I can’t help feeling anxious and hopeless at the small setbacks. My sister came over yesterday and he went absolutely bananas, growling, Barking , had his fur all spikey. It really disheartened me and I’m worried I’ve made a mistake, maybe introduced them too early? The lack of sleep is driving me nuts too, he’s fine in his crate if we are in the room but as soon as we try and go to bed and leave the room the howling and crying begins. I just get up in the mornings feeling distressed. Like I’m failing at this ? But then I go onto this page and see others like yourself and I instantly feel ten times better. I’m not alone , and neither are You , all I keep being told is patience patience patience. This will pass eventually and we will have 2 very good doggies and a friend for life ❤️❤️❤️ we got this I’m sure of it xxx

2
FitzarrOP•

Things are feeling a bit more manageable now. We've not had any house accidents so far today and she's definitely getting the crate routine.

1
rockebottom•

Hi! I think I saw your wife’s post in the greyhounds sub when you got your pup! I have an 8 month old galgo and while I love her more than pretty much anything, she’s a demon spawn. I wanted an adult dog but the rescue asked if I would take a puppy since I go to school online full time and I don’t work so of course I said yes but MAN. I got her at 16 weeks old and I cried so many times for the first few weeks after adopting her. The good news though is it really REALLY does get better! She’s still a lot to handle but it got so much easier when I bonded with her and noticed all the progress she had made. I really recommend using frozen kongs or chews to keep the pup busy while you get some peace or, if you can, get someone to hang out with her for an hour or two while you decompress. Everyone recommends that but it helps more than I thought it would. Good luck to you!

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1
Norma1966•

Good morning. First and foremost, I hope that your parents improve daily and are able to leave the hospital very soon.

Am I understanding that you picked up your dog 2 days ago? If so, if it feels this awful so soon, perhaps now isn't the right time for you to have a puppy in your home. We have had our 14 wk old for 2 months, and while there are incremental improvements, we still struggle on the daily with many of the same issues – frequent walks, loss of sleep, "accidents", biting, barking, etc. I just had to leave my bedroom like a ninja warrior so I wouldn't risk waking ours up. There is loads of joy and love all around, without a doubt, but there are still moments of "WTF have we done?!".

I also worry for you about "It feels like my comfortable life I had before has been taken away". You chose to bring a puppy into your home. It's hard to fathom that I'm being this blunt before I've had coffee, but it sounds like now is not the right time, that your puppy would be better off in a home where its human didn't resent its presence. That you feel guilty is fine, I suppose, but it's not the way to raise this little one, with resentment. While I know that my life would be easier without our pup, I cannot imagine life without him now, and the relief I long for is when he sleeps on the couch while I work, not the relief that he is gone completely.

The hard decision is often times the right decision – rehome your pup.

0
FitzarrOP•

Thank you for your kind and blunt words.

We've taken some steps today which have started to make things feel more manageable. We're getting her onto a crate schedule that is really helping so far, and we're so far accident free inside.

I think I needed a space to vent in a difficult moment more than anything else.

2
Kitten_Mittens•

A crate schedule will save you! We have had our 15-week-old puppy since she was 8 weeks, and I balance working from home plus my two young children and husband (who are gone most of the day at school/work). We created a positive association with the crate from day one and are lucky that she enjoys chilling there. She spends one to two hour sessions in her crate multiple times throughout the day, allowing me to take conference calls, run errands, prepare meals, and fold laundry without her stealing all the socks 😉. Of course there are plenty of walks, play time, training sessions, and (attempted) snuggles in between. Her crate is in a different area of the house from me, and I also have a small playpen in my office. Separation anxiety is non-existent, and this arrangement has helped minimize the puppy blues in our house. Good luck!

2
FitzarrOP•

Thank you! I'm currently working in the same room as her crate to help her get used to things (but not acknowledging crying etc) - my plan next week is to go back to working in my regular office and only come down for toilet times and play times.

2
Kitten_Mittens•

Sounds like you are figuring it out! We initially had the crate out in our living room during the day, but after I moved it into our room full time and added some white noise, she was able to chill in there longer with much less whining. I also have a small Kong-like toy that I fill with a little bit of soft dog food every time I put her in the crate. That helps her settle, and now every time I bust it out she heads straight to her crate in anticipation.

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