Source
r/OCPoetry•
BradGoesWild

Lament of an Alcoholic

Shudder as I reread the title. Admittance of failure. Fingers spell out my own demise. I know I won’t change. Though I am told to.

Life lazes by. I am but sedated observer. Passively occupied. Never free.

Should a bottle come with a grave? Better for a grave to come with a bottle. Who is more in need when the former is forced upon them?

Pause now. Inundated with self-doubt. Who reads the ravings of a madman? Why bother.

​

Spark now. Pull from the bottle pulls from the mind. Remember why. Why anything? Bottle fills in what mind cannot. Purpose.

Pause again. Mind blanked. Mindless reach for bottle.

​

​

I am what I am.

​

​

Recollect. Remember. What I meant to be. Who I meant to be. Why I meant to care. Pull. Who cares.

Does the man find the bottle or does the bottle find the man? Does this even make sense?

​

Wow I think this might just be gibberish.

I guess everything is gibberish if you think every writer is a clown.

Whoever heard of a sad clown? Lol who hasn’t? More like - whoever heard of a worse cliché?

Oh I’m sad? Haha go cry about it. While you enjoy your privileged life. Pathetic.

​

Pull.

Pull.

Pull.

​

​

Blank.

​

Bottle gone. Mind gone. Purpose gone. Wallet gone.

Belong in gutter. Wake up in soft bed.

Repeat.

​

Rule1

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/md9v4y/attitude/gs8f32z?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/md2026/tea_party/gs848sx?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

​

(I'm sorry if these aren't high enough effort, my drunk ass tried :/)

Posted Mar 25, 2021, 11:47 PM UTC

1210
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1
ozzygirl1210•

I enjoyed this ❤️

1
BradGoesWildOP•

Thank you mizz ozzy girl <3

1
lucarelolz•

I really loved this. If I were to make a suggestion I’d say that you’re obviously creative, so why not make poetry a regular creative outlet? It works for me and I have my fair share of... vices as well

1
BradGoesWildOP•

I'd be shocked if I was anything but terribly boring sober

2
RandomNotes•

This poem resonated with me. I struggle with alcohol too. Management is a step in the right direction.

1
BradGoesWildOP•

I am so grateful that I've come from a place of reckless abandon to relative control with alcohol. Management is exactly it.

2
RandomNotes•

Booze is hard, it's why they call it hard liquor. It can crack our crust, but our skin can always grow thicker

1
aspiringalways24•

I really enjoyed the way you wrote this poem (diction? - sorry, I’m new to this). While reading, I feel like I’m in the mind of someone who struggles with addiction. This is something of interest to me already (it runs in the family). I envisioned this dialogue occurring in the mind of this family member of mine, and maybe that’s why this style of writing worked for me.

“Should a bottle come with a grave?...” in this verse/stanza, I can imagine how the choice to drink is wrestled with, and how the initial thought is transformed into a justification but how it’s still just as confusing for the alcoholic as it might be for those on the outside.

Thanks for sharing.

1
asearchforyou•

Shudder. This isn't "polished," but I don't know that it would be better if it were. Style should follow purpose, and your purpose seems to be taking us through your troubled thought process. A day in the mind of an alcoholic.

Whoever heard of a sad clown? Lol who hasn’t? More like - whoever heard of a worse cliché?

Oh I’m sad? Haha go cry about it. While you enjoy your privileged life. Pathetic.

You're writing a line, and then reacting to it in real time. A diary entry, but more.

One line that stood out to me:

I am what I am.

This is biblical language, but you have subverted it. Instead of amplifying the indescribably transcendent character of God, you are using these famous words to reduce the meaning and potential of your own damn life. Not BradGoesWild, you are merely an alcoholic. A gutter retch. A sad clown cliché.

1