Source
r/OCPoetry•
Wildcat3318

A conversation with my father

“When’s the last time you prayed.”

cupping a fatally injured robin as gently as I would rainwater. I prayed for it not to die.

“I don't know a few days ago.”

“You know you can talk to me about anything.”

I want to tell you about the dying robin and how all my half-hearted prayers are just apologies.

But the mantra you raised me with, spare the rod spoil the child, still rings in my ears.

I want to tell you about all the times I've tried to get you to understand how much I do not—

“I know.”

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/s7wb67/mirror/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/s7zt6g/void/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Posted Jan 20, 2022, 2:16 AM UTC

86
aoife_dopp•

Incredibly evocative piece. I have a hard time communicating with my dad, and this really hits something for me. In particular I love that the set dressing of the poem is prayer and loss. Such personal things, but things that family feels are owed to them. The second last line implying a flood of things you want to say, only to be cut off by/ignored in favour of a simple outward phrase? So good!!

2
ISumer•

Great work. I feel like you were somehow able to communicate through your poem about the apparent distance between the father and child, and probably their different opinions / life choices / disagreements, and yet the underlying longing to understand each other and wanting to love and be loved.
Also, I think only dads could ever say "spare the rod, spoil the child".

2
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1
Michael2014-•

My Dad passed away a few years ago. I still don’t believe it. My Dad had always been there. He was a rock. This work brings back that rock feeling. It brings back my tears, that lump in my throat. I like it and hate it for that. But overall, I like it. It’s like a hug from my own Dad. Thank you.

2
Wildcat3318OP•

I’m sorry for your loss. With this poem I was trying to get across how it’s hard to say what we mean sometimes, especially with difficult subjects.

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cimi10caban•

This poem is relatable not in story but feeling. I can easily read as if I were talking to my father. I can relate to keeping things secret from those we love, and how that sits in the back of my mind.

Lovely piece, calm pace yet rhythmic.

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