U OK hun?
Someone wants to talk about things, which is fine, but you're going to have to drag it out of her.
Posted Jan 21, 2022, 10:44 AM UTC
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My journey ravenmum is to do all I can to re-parent myself. Unlike others (although I suspect there are more then realise) I was deeply affected by my childhood. I then went into a 12 year abusive marriage. It wasn’t until I had my daughter that I got out, I had a deep need to keep her safe.
I had another thread about it but content [I think maybe contact] will be restarting with her dad after a couple of years without any. I have to be the best person I can be for her. I owe it after giving her the worst father I could.
Oh, the draaaama!
So I went and found the other thread and read all her posts so you don't have to (you can thank me later) and TL;DR her ex sounds abusive but she also sounds like a royal PITA. It's a shame they (1) split up and (2) have a child as if they'd stayed together, childless, they have been keeping two nasty pieces of work out of circulation. Anyway, the courts didn't come down on her side and she's bitter about it.
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MY JOURNEY, to re-parent myself is amazing. Book cover. ASK ME WHAT HAPPENED GO ON ASK ME, No, I'LL TELL YOU ANYWAY, woah there boundaries. Self help speak bingo with this one. Feel sorry for the DD having to look after herself all her life while her mother makes terrible decisions and now is too busy nurturing her inner child and forcasting the future with cliches. Bit late now for all that aspirational talk. Let's hope she can become the best person she can be, while she live, love laughs and feels things in her soul or something, deeply connected to people. Pity me posting, zero insight, there must be a reason I did a bad job of it, whyyyy, tell me everyone you're the same and you made the same mistakes because reasons, there's reasons, its not my responsibility because reasons, so what I did was ok, because we are all so alike. Nope.
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Mymindisblown Fri 21-Jan-22 10:02:39
What are we actually seeking in them?
We go into them with unloved parts of ourself, traumas, agendas, needs and wants.
We are literally searching for someone to complete those incomplete parts it seems.
Then life changes and people change and there needs change so they stick it out in unhappy relationships.
Complicated.
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Someone doesn't like us!
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2 many sneks on MNtrollz, hun xxxo
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Three posts and still being coy...
Today 10:02Mymindisblown
What are we actually seeking in them?
We go into them with unloved parts of ourself, traumas, agendas, needs and wants.
We are literally searching for someone to complete those incomplete parts it seems.
Then life changes and people change and there needs change so they stick it out in unhappy relationships.
Complicated. Go to post
Today 10:26Mymindisblown
I guess if you had a pretty uncomplicated childhood and not too many issues to bring into adulthood it helps. I did not and for a long time made terrible relationship issues trying to fix issues I didn’t know I had. Go to post
Today 10:54Mymindisblown
Yep and going by mumsnet there lots of people who have complicated relationships also as there are those who don’t.
I left my complicated relationship and did a whole load of work on myself. Unfortunately you can only fix something you become aware needs fixing through experience, some of those experiences are shit and awful.
I’m glad there are those people who don’t expect others to fix them, I aspire my daughter to be one of those.
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Another one I'm glad I dont know/sit next to at work/see at the school gates. What do we all want, deep down, I mean really want, what motivates you, tell me about your feelings, how unhappy are you? Please don't, don't talk to me about it, sort yourself out love.
But what does it all meeeeeeaaaan????? 😂
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