GENERAL REMARKS


Generally speaking, I thought this was a well-written piece, and with a very interesting idea at its core, however some crucial information is served out of order that unfortunately doesn’t help maximizing interest in your story.


TITLE


I think the title is interesting. Although it doesn’t tell me a lot about what the story will be like, after having read this first part you posted, I think the title is fine. In the title is a sort of warning, I guess, anyway it gives me the sense of something more sinister that is to come, despite sounding a bit mundane and trivial. Maybe I’m reading too much into this, but that’s my impression.


THE IDEA


Which brings me to the idea, which I really love, so I’ll give it its own section. The idea is like a reversed schizophrenia. I really want to read more now that I know our MC is a doctor who will try to cure a patient, that is projecting illness into the heads of people around her, that her illness manifests in symptoms in ot

Hi all, 

For your destructive consideration - the opening to a short SciFi story about a child capable of projecting illusions and visions into people's minds.

**Some quick questions -** 

Is there enough information to keep you invested? Was it clear what was going on?

Would you read on?

Is it a bit rushed? Is the pacing okay?

&amp;#x200B;

Many thanks!

Critique - [\[1648\] Mr Dundas](https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/svsv5k/1648_mr_dundas/hy38lok/?context=3)

Piece - [\[658\] Seeing Is Believing](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1POAMznSmeYwgKMabYR3GZYaEjv-6Ue3zNooLuRZg2zM/edit?usp=sharing)

[658] Seeing Is Believing