Struggling Tonight
I think about killing myself by overdosing on drugs sometimes when I’m feeling really low. Tonight I’ve been dwelling on it a lot. I’m so tired, you know? I just can’t keep on going alone like this. I haven’t spoken to anyone face-to-face in six months.
I had a call with my therapist today, and I think she’s frustrated with me. I think I’m probably on the autism spectrum, and there’s just nothing anyone can do for me. I’m weird. I’m annoying. I’m aloof. I’m this. I’m that. Whatever. I’d be anything for anyone if I just knew how. I don’t know. Sometimes I just think the world has been overrun by evil, and it’s too late to fight back. The end of the world already happened decades ago, and we’re just stuck in some kind of dark epilogue.
Posted Jun 16, 2022, 4:52 AM UTC · edited
I understand all of these feelings. Been there more times than I can count. I’m so sorry your therapist isn’t accepting you in a time of crisis. That’s fucked. I hope you are in a place where you can maybe find an alternate therapist, but I know that can be complicated. I happen to love the weirdo, aloof, annoying, sad creatures of the earth. I’m my opinion we need more of them, not less. Even though it hurts like a bitch. With love. A fellow weirdo.
Thanks, I appreciate it.