
Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

If you really enjoyed this poem and just want to drop a quick comment, to show some appreciation or give kudos, things like "great job!" or "made me cry", or "loved it" or "so relateable", please do. Everyone loves a compliment. Thanks for taking the time to read and enjoy.

If you want to share your own poem, you'll need to give this writer some detailed feedback. Good feedback explains from your point of view what it was like to read the poem, and then tries to explain how the poem made you feel like that. If you're not sure what that means, check out our [feedback guide](https://new.reddit.com/r/ocpoetry/wiki/feedbackcritiques), or look 

I suppose you could say it's about how people are programmed from birth, socially emotionally never truly being free, taught to fear that which they don't know, taught to be faithful in the great unknown,  the beginning the end its the same to me, existence is just the inbetween.

The gate resides in the darkness of unfolding time when the moment arrives it will be unlocked for all of mankind.

I guess the true path is towards the great unknown, it's the thing both sides have faith in but also the thing they fear, progress is the future we don't know the future most fear the future yet progressives have faith in progress. the will of God is unknown yet the conservatives put their faith in it, the end is foretold and yet they fear it is unknown.

It's as if existence is the nonsequitur culmination of faith and fear in the unknown.

This is pretty interesting, I appreciate the rap-like feel with all the internal rhymes and whatnot. Also, is the narrator in this, like, a personification of a concept? The idea of progress or what is the "true path" that these extremists on either side fail to realize? Pretty cool stuff. I do feel like you can definitely expand on this though! Would love more clarity on the speaker and their context.

I found this perfectly simple and thought provoking; to read it feels almost like a satisfyingly inconclusive riddle (much like the human experience!). I think the length and structure complement the content well, and I particularly like the phrase ‘the beginning ends the ending starts’ (although unless it’s intentional I believe needs a comma or an ’and’). It’s a playful, oxymoron-dense couple of clauses and it puts me in mind of the cyclical and unfathomable nature of life. It also reminds me of the way the book ‘Catch 22’ is written - if you haven’t already, from your poem, I think you would really enjoy it!! 

The only thing I might change is the use of the word ‘religious’ twice; due to it being a short poem, repetition, unless it’s purposeful can read just slightly clumsily. But yeah! It’s great!

The poem is easy to follow and the context is easy to understand. I have two **suggestions but the poem can be fine without them.** 

\- Expand on the key and you who is holding it. Are you holding the gate of which group(s)? Are you holding the key of a direction to go other (ending, starting, straying, knowledge, etc...) 

\- The conservative and liberal groups hate you. Expand on why (I don't think it's too needed because it can be inferred that many people have a blend of ideas (don't support immigration but are for abortion) example. Or a person doesn't fit any subset but groups wish them to "pick a side" and will get any if they don't. Although, you could go in a similar direction/added or different where it's all fundamentals and groups are a construct. ). But the reader doesn't know this. So, we are left on "why" do these groups hate you. It's easy to understand due to a blend of ideas being the most likely reason but still so much is left out. 

&#x200B;

I think this poem is 

I have to say I don't always like when poems are topical. It's all too common to see works all take the cliche sides of the aisle, but I don't get that vibe from yours, which is refreshing. Formatting could be a little weird, just be mindful of where you place commas and periods, think about them as partial/full stops. Thanks for sharing!

Conservative religious sheep, 
 liberal progressive freaks, 
both hate me, yet its I they seek, 
the path of progress, the religious start.
 Fundamentals exponentials 
they all play their part, 
the beginning ends
 the ending starts, 
I hold the key to the gate in the dark

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/vlic2e/divide/idvep0p?utm_medium=android_app&amp;utm_source=share&amp;context=3

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/vleckw/addiction/idve862?utm_medium=android_app&amp;utm_source=share&amp;context=3