This put me through a spiral. This poem has a value and can be interpreted in different ways, also thanks to the purposefully absent punctuation, something that can often offer multiple way of the phrasings. The imagery in this poem is what spoke to me at first read: dark, useful and precise, it gave me goose bumps. I think, even though there can be some serious improvement, there's great -great- potential in this! Keep writing, please.


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I like this poem. It is clear-cut and straight to the point with some metaphors and imagery. Here is my humble comment, and please forgive any shortcomings from me.

"This suspenseful rhymed poem is one of fear and growth. Simple structure and understandable words are the primary features of this poem. The reader can feel the poet's fear through their work. One can feel the poet was in a constant battle with his past, a past that constantly comes to haunt the poet. The poet tries to justify their fear by presenting to the reader and the people around them justifications as to why the poet is in fear.

The poet realizes they are in fear because they did not face their fears. The resolution of the conflict in this poem is illustrated by the poet's speech to their strict father. The poet speaks back by realizing that they must tell their fear that they no longer fear. The poet acknowledges the psychological need to stop this torture in order to continue their lives normally. "

The poet r

Someone's out to get me

I don't know their name

Someone's out to get me

Please let me explain

The other day I found a cloud

While sitting on my bed

It was made from darker things

Like callings of the dead

My father shouted

Deep in pain

Look old man

I must remain in this present time

The devil's child is acting wild

I'm trying to find my bride

He looked at me

Then grit his teeth

Until they dripped and bled

Listen here, little shit

You'll soon be fucking red

But, father, no, I'm not the boy

Who hid under your bed

I'm the one who kept his tongue

And this is what he said

....

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/w0tm8z/our\_children\_are\_listening/](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/w0tm8z/our_children_are_listening/)

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/w0k32o/decorum\_voice\_in\_head/](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/w0k32o/decorum_voice_in_head/)