Yeah and I think more simpler words would make the poem more easy to interpret and overall really add to the ancient vibe.

Hello, thanks for the feedback. I can see how those metaphors might be a little vague. I suppose I was trying to conjure up the image of ancient stone carvings, such as those made by the Picts. Ian hindsight, it may have been more effective to deal with that directly in the form of a clear, concise image. I agree that the images used are lacking a certain something.

Honestly speaking, this is a really neat poem that I think shows how knowledge too can't survive the tides of time. My problem is at the 2nd and last line.  


>bound them to the **bones of the earth**  
  
>  
>in all their wisdom, **buried in the ancient roots.**

In these sentences I'm not really sure what the metaphor implies. Nothing comes to my mind so I would probably like if it was something simpler, since it felt like I hit a wall because I had to think what the metaphor meant and it sorta ruined the flow for me.  


Other than that, I really like how you used 3rd person POV. It makes it seem like you were talking about people of another time, and it really made the whole poem sound really rustic.

HIHIH, if I may ask, what do you think OP meant by bones of the earth and buried in the ancient roots?

Thank you, I’ll have to take a look in the near future.

I do think your poem stands alone.   
I find your choice of subject matter intriguing and layered with mystery. I can only say I would love to read more.  
Ancient stone writings ( including pictographs) have been a topic much explored by art historians and others. With this in mind, I wonder if you are familiar with the work of the great historian Arnold Toynbee? You may find his essay interesting ON THE FUTURE OF ART.  He presents and explores the following question: Is Art Communicative or Esoteric.”.  1972. He begins with a review of ancient stone markings. I wish you the best with your work.

Heya Eliza, how do you think I could develop this further?

I love this idea and the subject of ancient writings. I feel there may be a way for you to continue this poem.  If so I would love to read it.


Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

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They carved passages in stone, 

bound them to the bones of the earth

so that others might return to them - 

bear witness to the words long written down, 

but on returning found their passages

in all their wisdom, buried in the ancient roots.

&amp;#x200B;

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/w9ipw1/comment/ihvb8cv/?utm\_source=share&amp;utm\_medium=web2x&amp;context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/w9ipw1/comment/ihvb8cv/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=web2x&amp;context=3)

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/w9i5yz/comment/ihvbsbq/?utm\_source=share&amp;utm\_medium=web2x&amp;context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/w9i5yz/comment/ihvbsbq/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=web2x&amp;context=3)

Epistemology