I love that there is so much more meaning when you realise the situation that is was written in. It grabs onto a spark of hope and builds a fire out of it

Aww, what a lovely poem. I can feel the narrator’s pouring love for the other. I particularly like the fourth stanza, I think that’s a really nice imagery. My only critique is I would hope to have a more impactful ending, but good work none the less. Keep writing!

This was wonderful and it fills me with happiness. That last line was particularly beautiful. Thanks for sharing.

I love this! I really like the imagery you conjured when you talked about covering her like a summer rain. I think it really articulated a sensual thing that wouldn’t otherwise be clear to the reader.


Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).

If you really enjoyed this poem and just want to drop a quick comment, to show some appreciation or give kudos, things like "great job!" or "made me cry", or "loved it" or "so relateable", please do. Everyone loves a compliment. Thanks for taking the time to read and enjoy.

If you want to share your own poem, you'll need to give this writer some detailed feedback. Good feedback explains from your point of view what it was like to read the poem, and then tries to explain how the poem made you feel like that. If you're not sure what that means, check out our [feedback guide](https://new.reddit.com/r/ocpoetry/wiki/feedbackcritiques), or look 

From a collection of poems I wrote while deployed to Afghanistan. Formatting got messed up when I posted so my apologies for that.

When I see you again
Everything around us will disappear 
As the clock ticks off minutes that I am dying to spare

When I see you again
I will hold your hands 
Just to enjoy the way they feel in mine

When I see you again
I will lose myself in your smile
Never having the want to be discovered again

When I see you again
I will melt for you
Covering every inch of your body like warm summer rain

When I see you again
I will kiss your lips
Feeling your heart beat with mine as if they were one

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/wbosb4/the_aftertaste/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=ios_app&amp;utm_name=iossmf

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/wbohs7/keep_on_spittin/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=ios_app&amp;utm_name=iossmf

When I See You Again