I'm 16 again.
i feel like i’m 16 again. i’m 16 and petrified all over again. the only difference between the frail girl that once stood here and the woman that stands here now, is that she was somehow braver.
she had the fight in her still. she knew that just because this home had walls and the walls had pictures placed haphazardly on them, it didn’t make this structure a home. no matter how hard i’ve tried, this place was once home to a scared yet brave little girl.
but it was never a home by choice, it was a home because she had no other option. now here i am today. i stand where she once stood with the same tears of disappointment filling my eyes.
i thought you had changed or this “home” could maybe be mine this time around. this building wasn’t home then, it isn’t my home now.
one day i’ll have a home. it’ll have the most beautiful walls but that won’t make it my home. the laughter coming through the windows and the warmth filling the rooms will remind me what a home is.
one day i’ll learn what a home is. reminders of you will fill it, but you will not. you will not taint this place for me, i’m not 16 anymore.
Posted Sep 17, 2022, 6:15 AM UTC