I am unmade by you.
Piece by piece you take me apart.
I do not come with schematics
And you rebuild me in a new configuration.
If a ship replaced board by board is the same ship
What are the pieces of me reformed?
What will you christen me at port before I leave you?
Set to sea
Held together through your craftsmanship
And without my maker.
Posted Sep 29, 2022, 12:26 AM UTC
It's a piece that share devolution but shows space we have for growth
“I do not come with schematics.” Ouch Having to be a new person while the person who remade you stays the same is so hard. This is so deep in just a few lines
I absolutely loved this poem! It has basically made itself a hole in my mind because of its quite amazing symbolism. When I first read it, I immediately thought of a sort of goodbye, but as I re-read it, I started seeing it as a cry for help before being pushed under.
The first few lines invited me to very freely imagine, so I enjoyed the added symbolism of a ship stuck at a dock. As I read it, I imagined a ship being rebuilt without permission and being forced to set sail. I felt a bit of fear, as the journey without its maker was described, and I couldn’t help but feel a kinship with this character.
I felt very pulled in, and I experienced every fear and cry. This is very hard to do, so I applaud you.
Over all, I’ve fallen in love with this symbolism, and I find new thoughts and feelings after each re-read. Great job!
Very nice read! Thank you!
I sense unhealthy relationship here strongly. There's a sense of loss of humanity (refering to self with boat reference) loss of sense of self and really there's sort of a sad hollow tone of someone questioning who they are after a bad relationship. Fantastic poem! Keep up the good work!
Hello readers, welcome to OCpoetry. This subreddit is a writing workshop community -- a place where poets of all skill levels can share, enjoy, and talk about each other's poetry. Every person who's shared, including the OP above, has given some feedback (those are the links in the post) and hopes to receive some in return (from you, the readers).
If you really enjoyed this poem and just want to drop a quick comment, to show some appreciation or give kudos, things like "great job!" or "made me cry", or "loved it" or "so relateable", please do. Everyone loves a compliment. Thanks for taking the time to read and enjoy.
If you want to share your own poem, you'll need to give this writer some detailed feedback. Good feedback explains from your point of view what it was like to read the poem, and then tries to explain how the poem made you feel like that. If you're not sure what that means, check out our feedback guide, or look through the comment sections of any other post here, or click the links to the author's feedback above. If you're not sure whether your comments are feedback, or you have any other questions, please send us a modmail.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
I think this is a great piece To me I interpret this as growth but leaving you with a sense of wonder. Who is this mystery person? A mother? A father? A significant other? Do you not recognize yourself anymore? And are you scared to lose this person? Maybe they hold you together and the sea is not forgiving. Are you ready for what comes after? Overall I think this was a great read!