I don't think I have any critiques, but I wanted to say this is one of my favorites I've come across so far here. Third stanza is my favorite; love the wording of it. "When my law has been infringed" feels hard, firm. Moreso than just that a line has been crossed; a door has been ripped open that was locked to the best of your ability.


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Really enjoyed this one! Was very smooth and felt free of cliches. I also agree with the other comment about the third stanza being my favorite. Truly was a power in that one that stood out in the language you used.

I agree with the other commenters. 
It's short and concise, but I don't feel like it lacks anything.
The meaning is highly relatable to many including myself to some degree. But you manage to express a quite common concept in ways and images I have not seen before, so it still felt new to me. The language feels eloquent but not overdone.
Thank you, I enjoyed that!

I love how well you worded it. Suffering from a lot on my end so it was a really nice read. Thank you so much for sharing!

 Battered by the ways of the world,

I careen from tragedy to tragedy-

comfort grows, I’m nested in the low.

&amp;#x200B;

Down here there's a homey feeling,

And I'm safe from the paranoia I feel,

Always waiting for the good to crumble.

&amp;#x200B;

Anything gold comes at a great cost,

And when my law has been infringed,

Jealousy and anger seep to the surface.

&amp;#x200B;

Child-like, my concept of “fairness”,

Comes into play while suddenly my ego

Is against the world and so I suffer on…

&amp;#x200B;

&amp;#x200B;

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/y6v75f/comment/issjg0a/?utm\_source=share&amp;utm\_medium=web2x&amp;context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/y6v75f/comment/issjg0a/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=web2x&amp;context=3)

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/y737yk/comment/issix77/?utm\_source=share&amp;utm\_medium=web2x&amp;context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/y737yk/comment/issix77/?utm_source=share&amp;utm_medium=web2x&amp;context=3)

Suffer On